To me, cheese is something that comes into play based on the attitude of the player and the place the game is at. At a tourney, there is no such thing as you are there to win, period. In friendly games however, it is cheesy to bring the 9 Oblit/4 pie plate IW army to the table or similar things that you KNOW are going to screw over your opponents. That is cheese because most friendly games are specifically played with lists that are more fluffy or just outright more fun to use. Bringing a powergamer army to that kind of setting is cheese to me, bringing the same list to a tourney is fair play.
Attitude plays a bigger role in it to me though. If you are a cocky jackass standing there with a smirk on your face because you know your multiple FotD droppoding libby army is going utterly destroy my Tau in a couple turns, I won't play you again. Ever. That is not a fun game to me and it is something I would never do myself when playing in the local group. We have a GT winner here in our local group and he plays IW and not one of us can complain that his list is cheesy. He deliberately takes choices that aren't in your typical IW list just because it is more fun and provides both him and his opponent with a more enjoyable game. That is the attitutde more people need in this hobby.
Attitude plays a bigger role in it to me though. If you are a cocky jackass standing there with a smirk on your face because you know your multiple FotD droppoding libby army is going utterly destroy my Tau in a couple turns, I won't play you again. Ever. That is not a fun game to me and it is something I would never do myself when playing in the local group. We have a GT winner here in our local group and he plays IW and not one of us can complain that his list is cheesy. He deliberately takes choices that aren't in your typical IW list just because it is more fun and provides both him and his opponent with a more enjoyable game. That is the attitutde more people need in this hobby.