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[Dark talon]Phase Three: Writing

3195 Views 36 Replies 10 Participants Last post by  Blood God
Please post your special characters for the chapter here.
Please read through the stickied fluff to find a niche for this character.

We need a minimum of six special characters submitted by July 1st 2008.

Feel free to post your WiP's here as well.

Create a character, with backstory, and game statistics.
The character and statistics should be appropriate for the game, and not any more powerful than a rogue chapter would have (they should be of the approximate power level of Huron Blackheart).

Of all the special characters created, THREE will make the final version of the codex.
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I have a few questions.

1. Are we allowed to write rules for Kilm Vashal, Master Retrave and Reclusiarch Tanthus?

2. Are we allowed to write supposition rules for the function of a 'talon' weapon. As it had been mentioned in the fluff some of the more powerful chapter members weild a talon weapon. I'm not sure if proper rules for it have been decided for it yet.

3. They are traitors undivided yes? Marks or endorsements from gods not applicable?

4. Terminator armour for anyone? I'm not sure if terminator armour would be something they have access to having read the fluff.

Just a few points to clear it up. I'd be willing to do some fluff work.
I have a few questions.

1. Are we allowed to write rules for Kilm Vashal, Master Retrave and Reclusiarch Tanthus?
I'd say yes, but of these, there is no guarantee they will end up in the final codex. The top three could be a Captain, Assault Sergeant and a sorcerer, who knows. Whatever the best three are.

2. Are we allowed to write supposition rules for the function of a 'talon' weapon. As it had been mentioned in the fluff some of the more powerful chapter members wield a talon weapon. I'm not sure if proper rules for it have been decided for it yet.
The talon was set up to be a weird cross of a weapon and a narthecum/ reductor which is somehow tied in with the omophagea gland. The rules for this not actually nailed down. It could certainly use some clean-up and a bit of reality check.
See this thread: http://www.heresy-online.net/forums/showthread.php?t=2369
That's all there really is on it, so if you want to flesh it out, go for it!

3. They are traitors undivided yes? Marks or endorsements from gods not applicable?
They are most certainly undivided, but they can have specialist troops/ cult troops in their list with limitations.

4. Terminator armour for anyone? I'm not sure if terminator armour would be something they have access to having read the fluff.
It would be safe to say they have access to it in very limited amounts. Maybe 0-1 on termy armor.
Alex's characters 1 & 2 of 5

Heres 2 (of a probable 5 i am brainstorming) characters i've been working on for the Dark Talons. The others are still in their infancy and i'm not so happy with their rules yet but they will get done eventually. For now its just these guys. Let me know what you think. I'll post my own thoughts about the chars just after their entries.


1. First Disciple Hezek.

Under the example and tutelage and guidance of Kilm Vanshal many of the dark talons have embraced possession as a further escape from any ties of mortality. But none have risen so far and achieved so much since this trend began as Hezek, first disciple of Vanshal. Deeply fanatical but utterly loyal, Hezek is captain to the contingents of possessed now massing the ranks of the Dark talons and it falls to him to lead and control them in war.

Pts 170
Name | WS | BS | S | T | W | I | A | Ld | Sv
Hezek | 5 | 5 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 5 | 3 | 10 | 3+

Wargear. Power armour, Frag and Krak Grenades, Demonic Talons.

Special Rules. Demonkin. Demon Brotherhood, 5+ invulnerable save, Fearless.

Weapons. Disciple Hezek is armed with demonic talons that count as a single power weapon.

Demonkin. Disciple Hezek is possessed by a demon of the warp and acts accordingly. At the start of every game he must roll a D6 to see which power he receives from the possessed abilities table (pg 29). On a roll of 4, instead of rending his weapons now count as pair of lightning claws. On a 6 he receives the warptime psychic ability.

Demon Brotherhood. Hezek may be accompanied by a unit of possessed chaos marines, if this is the case roll a single D6 when determining possessed abilities for both Hezek and his unit of possessed. When in a unit this result can be re-rolled once. You must accept the second result.


My reasoning behind Hezek as a character creation was really due to Vanshal. After leading many Dark talons to safety and giving them new purpose I could see many admiring possession and the gifts/knowledge it gave. I would believe the cult of possession within the Talons would be high. So I went and made a character based on that.


2. Torturer Issatroth.

The mysteries of the flesh held dark paths for Issatroth. The once apothecary saw soon after the betrayal the effect chaos had on men; regeneration, advanced growth and even resurrection. He soon became obsessed with trying to find ways to control this great power to heal. He had soon concocted wide range of agents and chemicals which he had psykers imbue with the powers of the warp. The effects were varied, some worked wonders other formed hideous mutations and grotesque monsters. Retrave ordered his work unfit to be performed on battle brothers and soon he could find no volunteers to test his crucial work. And so he began to stalk battlefields for limbs and bodies and soon he requested from Van Gaur to take prisoners. The usual slave rabble would have its fittest and its strongest removed for Issatroths next grand concoction. This brutal but thorough testing gave Issatroth the title of torturer rather than healer. He designed and created the Dark Talon weapon to draw blood and tissues from every race and enemy which he gave to the greatest champions among his brothers knowing well that they would fight only the strongest. Even after the second Betrayal when much of his data was lost with the retreating Van Gaur, Issatroth would not be denied his test subjects or experiments.
It was only when Fabius Bile heard of Issatroths work did he seek out the Dark talons. Issatroths pleas to master Retrave to dock saw that their meeting would go ahead and both learned much. It was however clear that they needed to learn more. The exchange was not only information, Issatroth gave to Fabius a talon and all of the mutagenic ichors he had created. In return Fabius altered the weapons to feed directly into the omophagea of the astartes allowing not only collection but incorporation of genetic material into the Astartes genetic structure. Along with this Fabius gave to Issatroth and the Dark Talons several suits of terminator armour, with the understanding that he could come and go as he pleased within the chapter.
Issatroth now leads one of the only Terminator squads available to the Dark Talons and Master Retrave has given him the right to pursue his mission on the many battlefields they fight across.

Pts 170
Name | WS | BS | S | T | W | I | A | Ld | Sv
Issatroth | 4 | 4 | 5 | 4 | 3 | 4 | 3 | 10 | 2+

Wargear. Terminator armour, Dark Talon, Combi-bolter.

Special rules. The True Talon, Twisted Narthecium, 5+ invulnerable save.

The True Talon. While many of his brethren have been issued new Talons and some aspiring champions have taken up wearing imitations, Issatroth has in his possession the original as worked on by himself and Fabius. All others are inferior copies wrought from its brilliance. The Dark Talon upon piercing the body then begins to drain the target of bodily fluids through a series of tubes linked to the almost needle like claw tips that can pierce armour even if the larger part of the claw cannot. Most go into shock immediately from serious blood loss if they are not killed outright. The blood is collected and some is absorbed by Issatroth and incorporated into his DNA. The infusion of the warp in this device also allows memories, feelings and combat styles to be stolen along with physical matter.
The Dark Talon carried by Issatroth counts as a lightning claw with the following additions. Infantry models hit by the dark talon have their initiative reduced to 1 in the next round of combat as they go into shock from blood/memory loss. After causing an unsaved wound on a troop squad Issatroth gains preferred enemy special rule against that particular squad. The Talon has no effect on Necrons.

Twisted Narthecium. Issatroth is still an apothecary no matter how far he has fallen. He will attempt to save one of his brothers should they fall in battle. The first time an unsaved wound is taken by the squad that is attached to Issatroth he will use his temperamental warp drugs on them to attempt revival. Roll a D6 and consult the table below for results.

5-6 = Success. The wound is ignored and the model continues as normal

3-4 = Mutation. Something has gone horribly wrong with the mix and the model becomes a mewling mass of flesh. If the player controlling Issatroth has a spawn model he can be replaced with that, if not the model is removed as a casualty. The spawn counts as a single independent model from the squad and Issatroth (it’s worth 40 victory points if killed.)

1-2 = Failure. The mixture is flawed and has no effect. The model is removed as a casualty.

Issatroth I spent quite a lot of time mulling over. He’s probably far too powerful for what we want but that’s for you guys to decide. I think he’s got a lot of character close to Fabius bile and that was very much what I wanted from him. I wanted to use the ties to Fabius to make a character who could learn from him.
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Kilm Vanshal

Pts 170
Ws 7
Bs 5
S 4
T 4
W 3
A 4
I 5
Ld 10
Sv 3+/5+

Wargear: Sword Of Vanshal, bolter, frag and krak grenades.

Special Rules: Independent character
Sword Of Vanshal
Chaos Tactician
Fearless
Warrior Of Death

Sword Of Vanshal: The sword Of Vanshal is an ancient power weapon which Vanshal has carried since becoming a Lieutenant gifted to him by Zso Sahaal. Vanshal has killed countless thousands with this blade he wields it with deadly precision and skill to feel its steel is to clash with death itself. The sword of Vanshal allows Vanshal to reroll all failed to hits, but is otherwise treated as a power weapon.

Chaos Tactician: Kilm Vanshal is a master tactician his tactics have never failed and he has led his chapter from victory to victory. He commands his forces inspirationally and they carry out his orders without a question. To serve under his command is to know victory. Any army fielding Kilm Vanshal has a strategy rating of 3.

Warrior Of Death: Vanshal is an inspirational fighter inspiring encouraging fearlessness into those around him and striking fear deep into the hearts of his enemies. Any unit that Vanshal joins automatically becomes fearless.
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Thanks for the response everyone. Keep the ideas coming!
All the ideas have been great
i Like Hezek. Might tear up one of my possessed to create him.
Kilm Vanshal
Wargear: Sword Of Vanshal, bolter, frag and krak grenades.

Special Rules: Independent character
Sword Of Vanshal
Chaos Tactician
Fearless
Warrior Of Death

Warrior Of Death: Vanshal is an inspirational fighter inspiring encouraging fearlessness into those around him and striking fear deep into the hearts of his enemies. Any fearless units in combat against Kilm Vanshal excluding independent characters lose their fearless abilities, and any unit Vanshal joins automatically becomes fearless.
Since he has a bolter and his uber sword, he'd be a good one for True Grit.

IMO Warrior of death is just a hair over the top: I'd make it give any unit he joins as becoming fearless. Removing fearless from other units...ummm, may be a bit much (thinking of death company, GK, etc...man you can't really take away their fearless).

That's just IMO. Otherwise it looks awesome.

Actually, everyone's doing great so far.
No queries from me but meh, what would i know. Well done again.
Nah, everything is looking solid so far.
Really like the fluff and rules for Issatroth. That is one very cool guy.
Ok new rule tell me if you like it

Ancient vendetta: Vanshal has spent much time plotting his vengeance upon the space marine scum that betrayed. It as been a long time, since he battled along side the space marine legions. His hatred has built up over thousands of years, this is a flaw for his hatred can be know to take over his mind, ordering insane charges and flying for the nearest enemy regardless of whether they are space marine or not. On the other hand when has a strong mind he can make his men do insane strategic feints. Roll a D6 once per battle and check this chart:

1: Vanshal gives into his hatred and orders a slaughterous charge.
all units gain the furious charge and fleet ability and must move to the nearest enemy unit every turn (this does not effect vehicles unless they are walkers).

2-5: Vanshal controls his hatred and stays calm carrying out the plan as planned
(nothing happens)

6: Vanshal Banishes hatred and has a clear mind he sees opportunities and takes them. all units are allowed to infiltrate and gain the scouts ability.
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I'm really not fan of that rule.

First off, I never cared mych for random abilities, but besides that...

As much fun as the word 'slaughterous' is, giving everyone fleet and furious charge, but forcing them to move towards the enemy really fucks you over if you bought any heavy weapons, or are facing an enemy with fast units and half a brain.

Any tactics you were planning to use go out the window as your army begins chasing empty rhinos.

And the 6 ability...first off, scouts and infiltrate happen during deployment, so you'd have to roll before the game begins. Besides that...Scouts *and* infiltrate, for *everyone*? That's a little insane, don't you think? Nothing like your whole army being able to pull off first turn charges.

I'm not trying to come down on you or anything, but you need to think about how this is supposed to work (especially when mixed together, like scouts and infiltrate) and how it impacts the way you play your army.
Weapons. Disciple Hezek is armed with demonic talons that count as a single power weapon.
Why don't they count as two weapons? How many talons are we talking about, both hands or just one?
Why not call it a lightning claw(s), it would fit better, I think.

Demon Brotherhood. Hezek may be accompanied by a unit of possessed chaos marines, if this is the case roll a single D6 when determining possessed abilities for both Hezek and his unit of possessed. When in a unit this result can be re-rolled once. You must accept the second result.
I like that. Makes possessed more useful. I would change the wording a little, just say 'designate one unit of possessed to be linked with Hezek...' etc rather than requiring that they accompany him. The rules are trending away from retinues, and since the units are from different FOC slots it makes things a little complicated.


Wargear. Terminator armour, Dark Talon, Combi-bolter.
What kind of combi-bolter?

The True Talon.

The Dark Talon carried by Issatroth counts as a lightning claw with the following additions. Infantry models hit by the dark talon have their initiative reduced to 1 in the next round of combat as they go into shock from blood/memory loss. After causing an unsaved wound on a troop squad Issatroth gains preferred enemy special rule against that particular squad. The Talon has no effect on Necrons.
Remember that the rules are both specific and generic.
If you say it just affects Infantry, then suddenly putting on a Jump Pack makes you immune to it.

Better to say non-vehicle model.

Also, I REALLY don't like singling out necrons as being immune.
Yes, I realize the fluff behind it but GW has *always* favored 'it works the same on everyone' approach. Necrons, for example, are not immune to Poisoned weapons, or Needle Sniper Rifles, or numerous other poisons, toxins and biology-dependent attacks. There's no point in giving Necrons another buff.

Besides...if it doesn't work on Necrons, then it can't work on Wraithguard, or Wraithlords either. Then what about Avatars, they;re made of lava...and of course, daemons are weird, maybe they don;t have organs...it gets complicated when you start trying to make sense of things. It's just the way GW does things.

Twisted Narthecium. Issatroth is still an apothecary no matter how far he has fallen. He will attempt to save one of his brothers should they fall in battle. The first time an unsaved wound is taken by the squad that is attached to Issatroth he will use his temperamental warp drugs on them to attempt revival. Roll a D6 and consult the table below for results.

5-6 = Success. The wound is ignored and the model continues as normal

3-4 = Mutation. Something has gone horribly wrong with the mix and the model becomes a mewling mass of flesh. If the player controlling Issatroth has a spawn model he can be replaced with that, if not the model is removed as a casualty. The spawn counts as a single independent model from the squad and Issatroth (it’s worth 40 victory points if killed.)
For a start, I'd change it from attached 'unengaged friendly model within 6 inches' to make it more in line with current rules for narthicum

And how often does this work, once per turn, once per game?
Having a 50/50 chance of either saving a model or xcreating a spawn every turn is pretty nasty.

Sorry if it feels like I'm being nitpicky, just trying to bring things in line with GW
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Thanks for the help Galahad. Hopefully our character creators can adjust these rules
Thats fine I admit the rule is a bit weird in the sense it is too powerful and to disadvantaging but what do you suggest I do make these rules applyto him only perhaps?
Is the rule really necessary?
I'lll make the additions/changes Galahad. Thanks for the feedback.

As for Hezeks weapons i'lll give him 2 power weapons. The lightning claws are in his possessed ability table.

Issatroths twisted narcathiuem is a one use only things that happens the first time a wound is taken by someone within his (now 6" as you suggested) sphere of influence.

I'm not sure why i said combi-bolter its just a twin-linked bolter.

Necrons are no longer immune, once i thought about it the things infused with the warp which would ruin necrons anyway, though then again making the warriors I 1 is hardly a hamper to their already low initiative.
Ok here goes, please remember i dont play chaos so if someone likes the basic statline and fluff for this guy go ahead and modify/ improve him.

Veteran Sgt Garius, P: 75
WS:5 BS:4 S:4 T:4
I:6 W:2 Ld: 10 Sv: 2+

Special rules:
Insane: Garius has completely lost his sanity and in the middle of a battle he can suddenly launch into a killing frenzy in which no one near him is safe.
Feel no pain, unable to join units,

Garius was leading his squad of assault marines behind the enemy lines to destroy a vital supply post at the time of the first betrayal. After the promised air extraction didnt arrive and no answer was heard on the vox he made the difficult choice to lead his men in fighting their way back to friendly lines. After several days of fighting only he and his closest comrade Kardon were left but just as they sighted their own lines several platoons of Blood pact fell on them, in the resulting chaos Kardon was killed and Garius barely escaped alive but as he reached the relative safety of the Dark Hands headquarters the sight of the last thunderhawk leaving broke the last pitifull vestiges of his sanity, at this point he came to the dreadfull certainty that they had been betrayed and if not for his cowardly bretheren his brothers might still live. Now Garius is a nearly unstoppable force of destruction bringing death to anyone, friend or foe that gets in his way.

Sorry about unfinished post will edit soon

Sniper
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