[Tyrannis]

Well this is basically You're Beautiful by James Blunt, except I changed the lyrics.

Your strength is brilliant

Your strength is brilliant, your toughness pure
I saw an Tyranid of that I'm sure
It roared at me on the Warpway
It was with another victim
But I won't lose no sleep on that
'Cause I've got a plan

A Carnifex, A Carnifex
A Carnifex, it's true
I saw your face in a crowded place
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you

Yes, it caught my eye
As I walked on by

It could see from my face that
I was flying high
And I don't think that I'll see it again
But we shared a moment that will last 'till the end

A Carnifex, A Carnifex
A Carnifex, it's true
I saw your face in a crowded place
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you

La la la la la la la la la

A Carnifex, A Carnifex
A Carnifex, it's true
There must be an Tyranid with ichor on it's face
When it thought up that I should be with you
But it's time to face the truth
I will never be with you

 

[Rahmiel]

Thats great. :grin:

 

[KarlFranz40k]

Hmmm, not bad but you really could have done something with the chorus instead of leaving it as it is.

 

[xiawujing]

hahaha, very nice!

 

[bishop5]

Hehehe, nice...
Unfortunately, James Blunt is still a **** (Rhyme's with Blunt)

 

[Siege]

It seems a little um... strange to me.

 

[shas'o_mi'ros'kai]

maybe the chorus should've went like this

A Carnifex, A Carnifex
A Carnifex, it's true
I saw your face tearing up Joe's face
And I don't know what to do
'Cause I'll never be with you

 

[wombat_tree]

Dude thats freaking awsome but id make a few changes -
1- replace victim with meal its shorter and sounds more like man
2- replace tyranids with 'nids. Tyranids is too long
3- In the chorus replace crowded place with raveged place it sounds more nidy
4- instead of caught my eye make it ripped my eye it just sounds more like something a fex would do

Yeah thats just my 10 cents