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viking blood 05-30-13 08:57 PM

reality
 
Ok, so i just noticed the "off topic" part of the forum and figured that hey, i got nothing to lose. I havent painted, modeled or posted in quite a while. The reasons are many. I first started to paint and model as an outlet for depression. A way to help calm myself while i sort through my thoughts and tried to get my head together. As time went by, my head got more messed up. Deaths in my family added an extra spiral to the plunge, then money issues. That started marital problems. Next thing i know i am hospitalized for being suicidal. Really have no rhyme or reason to post this other than the fact that it seems easier telling strangers than anyone else.

Sangus Bane 05-30-13 10:05 PM

Telling strangers is easier friend.

A good friend of mine has gone through something like what you just described.
He's managed to settle down somewhere, surround himself with new friends and he's happy now. There's always a way back to the top, don't you forget that.

Do you still feel for the hobby itself?

viking blood 05-31-13 03:55 AM

Yes, i still have an honest love for the hobby. I only put down the brushes till i can get a handle on everything goin on in life right now. Thank you for the kind words man, it gives hope

Loki1416 05-31-13 04:03 AM

Viking,

I was in your shoes man. Best thing that happened for me was going to therapy. I felt stupid talking about myself and discussing my feelings on EVERYTHING, but it worked for me. It's still an every day struggle (I have PTSD) but I am learning to cope and how to have a productive life. There are a ton of places that you can find someone to talk to (and your right, talking to strangers is easier) from hospitals, church, or straight to a therapists office. There are also toll free phone numbers you can call to talk to someone. Finding help is the easy part, taking the help is the hard part, but admitting that you DO need help is hardest of all. Being in the hospital and then saying what you said on here means that you've admitted it (or at the least acknowledged it). Your starting on the right path. Good luck to you. Don't be afraid to post your progress on here or even talk to us for help. There are a lot of people on here who have been where you are and can offer some valuable help.

viking blood 05-31-13 01:22 PM

Thanks loki, im starting therapy on june 4th. My dr switched my pills around and, just to try thinking outside of the box, im trying accupunture as well. It wont be easy, as you well know. But heres to trying.

Bindi Baji 05-31-13 01:31 PM

I think I have suffered with mild depression but I'm one of those people that go to the doctor after a leg has fallen off and rarely before, my missus suffers really bad from time to time as well.

Good luck with therapy!, it works well for some and not for others but having outlets like modelling and other things can be really good, I find modelling is one of the best ways for me to de-stress.

It's good you are willing to try different things too!

morfangdakka 05-31-13 02:12 PM

It almost seemed like I could have wrote that opening post. I also suffer from depression and like you some deaths in the family then money problems, divorce, and ending up in the hospital with cancer really had me in a dark hole. So I know how it is but it is good you are trying things to get out of it. It won't be easy but do try to come back to the hobby a little I have and it has helped. I haven't built or painted anything yet but being on the forums, reading some fluff, planning some projects it has helped me. Anyway the strangers on here are always here for you. We are a community and we help each other out.
CHeers

viking blood 05-31-13 03:44 PM

Thank you everyone. I do plan on finishing off a project i started a while back


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