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post #1 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-27-10, 10:30 AM Thread Starter
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Default Horus' betrayal

I have an idea for a story using horus and the 19th primach or even the 20th please tell me if you have any objections or if there is already a story using the 19th primarch. May have to make a 21st lol.

"To the darkness I bring fire, to the ignorant I bring faith. Those who welcome these gifts may live, but I shall vist naught but death and eternal damnation on those who refuse them"
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post #2 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-27-10, 10:48 AM
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The Ninteenth is Corax if memory serves right? What kind of story will it be? What is the setting?

Nyctophobia- Fear of the Dark Angel.

"No one ever spoke about of those two absent brothers. Their separate tragedies had seemed like aberrations. Had they, in fact, been warnings that no one had heeded?"

'Killing a man is like fucking, boy, only instead of giving life you take it. You experience the ecstasy of penetration as your warhead enters the enemy's belly and the shaft follows. You see the whites of his eyes roll inside the sockets of his helmet. You feel his knees give way beneath him and the weight of his faltering flesh draw down the point of your spear. Are you picturing this?'
'Yes, lord.'
'Is your dick hard yet?'
'No, lord.'
''What? You've got your spear in a man's guts and your dog isn't stiff? What are you, a woman?'
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post #3 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-27-10, 09:00 PM Thread Starter
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Ok 20th it is. The idea is that you follow the Primarchs growth for a little until Horus arrives upon the planet, just as he's beginning to "lose it". He doesn't announce his suspicouns that he has found a Primarch. The next bits a little rough at the moment and needs some working but the basic idea is that he incorparetes the Prmarch somehwo into the Heresy. Was thinking at the end the Primarch assists the Emperor allowing for the slaying of Horus. Always thought that the the Emperor smote Horus down with the last of his strength was a little sketchy to say the least.

"To the darkness I bring fire, to the ignorant I bring faith. Those who welcome these gifts may live, but I shall vist naught but death and eternal damnation on those who refuse them"
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post #4 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-27-10, 09:29 PM
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Its a cool idea, but the Twentieth is Alpharius Omegon, I think you mean the Second and Eleventh?

Nyctophobia- Fear of the Dark Angel.

"No one ever spoke about of those two absent brothers. Their separate tragedies had seemed like aberrations. Had they, in fact, been warnings that no one had heeded?"

'Killing a man is like fucking, boy, only instead of giving life you take it. You experience the ecstasy of penetration as your warhead enters the enemy's belly and the shaft follows. You see the whites of his eyes roll inside the sockets of his helmet. You feel his knees give way beneath him and the weight of his faltering flesh draw down the point of your spear. Are you picturing this?'
'Yes, lord.'
'Is your dick hard yet?'
'No, lord.'
''What? You've got your spear in a man's guts and your dog isn't stiff? What are you, a woman?'
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post #5 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-27-10, 09:51 PM
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Second or eleventh so you got a choice of either.

i like the concept but the hard thing to get around would be the new Primarchs influence over his new legion to side with Horus. the reason why the other Primarchs had sway over their legions was down to the years they had fought together.
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post #6 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-28-10, 09:41 AM Thread Starter
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Ooooo ok second it is. The idea is that Horus keepss him secret. So he wouldn't really have his own legion as such.
Edit: brainwave! Perhaps the. Legion of the damned?!

"To the darkness I bring fire, to the ignorant I bring faith. Those who welcome these gifts may live, but I shall vist naught but death and eternal damnation on those who refuse them"
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post #7 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-28-10, 09:58 AM
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The Legion of the Damned were the Fire Hawks, not actually a Legion but rather a Chapter lost in the Warp while moving to a nearby system to destroy a Ork Waaagh! If I rememebr correctly. I like the idea however, how long would it be possible for Horus to keep him secret? Someone would be bound to find out eventually. And why would Horus keep him secret? What would be his motivations? After all, until Davin he was a staunch Loyalist.

Nyctophobia- Fear of the Dark Angel.

"No one ever spoke about of those two absent brothers. Their separate tragedies had seemed like aberrations. Had they, in fact, been warnings that no one had heeded?"

'Killing a man is like fucking, boy, only instead of giving life you take it. You experience the ecstasy of penetration as your warhead enters the enemy's belly and the shaft follows. You see the whites of his eyes roll inside the sockets of his helmet. You feel his knees give way beneath him and the weight of his faltering flesh draw down the point of your spear. Are you picturing this?'
'Yes, lord.'
'Is your dick hard yet?'
'No, lord.'
''What? You've got your spear in a man's guts and your dog isn't stiff? What are you, a woman?'
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post #8 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-28-10, 01:50 PM
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You can bet Torgaddon or Loken would defo snitch on Horus as soon as they found out and they were part of Horus's mournival. dont forget the 63rd expedition was crawling with remembrancers, thousands of whiny civilians wouldn't be able to keep their mouths shut.

Russ was right, they should've given them guns! lol
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post #9 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-28-10, 03:30 PM Thread Starter
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Yes, perhaps the young primarch is kept on the planet... I have an idea for the prologue and have wrote it out in note form. However the Internet on my computer is bust so I'm stuck to posting on my iPod which means it would take ages to copy it out manually. My fingers hurt from just posting this lol!

It would be set in the time when horus was beginning to question the emperors ways and thought he could get back against him by keeping it secret.

"To the darkness I bring fire, to the ignorant I bring faith. Those who welcome these gifts may live, but I shall vist naught but death and eternal damnation on those who refuse them"

Last edited by toffster; 02-28-10 at 03:33 PM.
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post #10 of 11 (permalink) Old 02-28-10, 04:37 PM
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Well it is a good idea however, fluff indicates that all twenty Legions and their Primarchs fought at least during the Great Crusade. Also, when Dorn talks with the Sigillite on Terra by the plithes of the Primarchs, he mentions something along the lines of "They are lost to us forever" and in one of the Audio-Books, if you look at the second sentance in my signature that is aimed at the pair. Not trying to ruin your idea or anything, but rather trying to strengthen it.

Nyctophobia- Fear of the Dark Angel.

"No one ever spoke about of those two absent brothers. Their separate tragedies had seemed like aberrations. Had they, in fact, been warnings that no one had heeded?"

'Killing a man is like fucking, boy, only instead of giving life you take it. You experience the ecstasy of penetration as your warhead enters the enemy's belly and the shaft follows. You see the whites of his eyes roll inside the sockets of his helmet. You feel his knees give way beneath him and the weight of his faltering flesh draw down the point of your spear. Are you picturing this?'
'Yes, lord.'
'Is your dick hard yet?'
'No, lord.'
''What? You've got your spear in a man's guts and your dog isn't stiff? What are you, a woman?'
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