Chapta' 4 - Unda'groundzez
The hole was deep. Very deep. So deep, in fact, that its epic deepness made the entry hole seem like a mere blip.
First to hit the ground was Drakk. Thanks to the grot's flexible bones, he only had bruises. Gobroz landed next to him... and Nagosh landed on both with a deafening crash.
“Sorry, flashgit Gobroz.”
“My... brainzez are comin' outta' my noze.”
“Oh... sorry, Drakk.”
The last to fall was an armoured sorcerer. Rakul shook his head, stood up, dusted off his armour, did a victory pose on the 'hill' and commented:
“Thank you for cusioning my fall, ork.”
“Uhhh... don't mentian it.”
Nebulon came soon after, using his axe to slow down his fall. He landed gently on the ground and looked at the rest.
The orks got up and looked around. They stood in some sore of corridor. One path had been blocked by a rock slide and the other led into darkness.
“Well, it seems you're going to have a lot of fun down here. Nebulon, would you be so kind?”
“Of course, master. See ya, boys!”
Nebulon raised his arm and... nothing happened. No purple cloud or disappearing, no nothing. The two stood there awkwardly.
“Oy, dat didn't work, eh?”
Rakul was annoyed.
“Grrrrrr. Something down here is blocking Warp energies. And that cannot be good.”
Gobroz' voice brought wisdom again, even if it was brought along with incorrect grammar:
“Oy, we'z shud work togeda'. Well, atleest 'till we'z get outta' 'ere.”
“An ork that shows intelligence. Interesting. What do you think, master?”
“Hmph. It doesn't look like we have a choice in this matter. Lead the way.”
And the group started moving, orks first.
They walked through the, at best, dimly lit corridors, silent. There wasn't really much to chat about and if they spoke... who knows what horrors they could attract.
After a while, they entered what seemed seemed to be a massive cave. Green orbs lit a path and they followed it, still in silence. It soon led them to a wide chasm, It was incredibly long, continuing far into the darkness.
Gobroz broke the silence:
“If I still had my teleporting powers, it would be easy. But...”
“Hmmm... Maybe there is some sort of switch or button on the other side?”
“Cud be. But how are we'z gunna get thar an' press it, flashgit Gobroz?”
Why did the boss always expect him to have an answer? Oh, right... smartboy.
The group stood there for a while... and Rakul then looked at Drakk. The sorcerer then nudged Nagosh.
“Wot?” Rakul pointed at the grot, ”oooooh! But who?”
This time, Nebulon was the one who grinned.
“I'll do it.”
Before Drakk knew what was happening, Nebulon caught him and held the grot like a javelin. The daemon then threw Drakk with all his might.
The gretchin flew through the air, limbs firmly together. He neatly passed over the chasm and then hit the ground, long nose first. He got up and looked around.
“Drakk! Find sum buttuny bit an' klik it!”
“Got it, boss!”
He spotted something akin to a small pedestal and walked over to it. A big green 'buttuny bit' was in front of him. He pressed it.
With a terrible racket, a bridge made out of a strange black metal appeared. The orcs and two chaos boys crossed over it.
“Gud job, Drakk.”
Another passageway was in sight, so they followed it.
On the surface, a peculiar case of organised chaos was going on. Fire warriors, guardsmen, heretical marines all kept running here and there, carrying supplies. It was strange what a crisis could do to enemies.
Carito was talking to a group of possessed:
“Whaddaya mean, your tentacle-arms ain't long enough to reach the bottom! I want you to make a rope!”
“Oh... not delicious.”
Not too far:
“Maybe we could use sssssome crane from you guardiessssss.”
“I'm afraid no crane has a long-enough reach for a hole of this epic deepness.”
“Can't we just dig our way down there? That would be smashing fun.”
“That would take weeks, even with the most advanced of the earth caste's technologies. The minerals in the mountains here are extremely durable.”
“Damnit! We have to get Rakul, Nebulon and the stupid orks outta' there somehow!”
At the very edge of the hole sat Mithara. Her gaze was fixed downwards.
The corridor yet again passed into a cave. But in this one, only the path could be seen, so they followed it still.
But soon, the sound of rapid footsteps reached their ears. They looked around, expecting something to come out of the darkness. But instead, a small spider sneaked beneath their legs. Only Drakk noticed it.
All of them did. The small machine had several pieces of gadgetry, all resembling eyes. A spy. It wandered off into the dark.
“I see you haaaave arrived.”
On the path ahead of them, two glowing green eyes appeared. The creature then stepped into the light.
Skeletal and awe-inspiring, to say the least. It was almost fully golden, save for the green mini-reactor in its chest, even though the metal it was made of was obviously something far more alien, since green energy coursed through it. A blue cape was on its back The scepter it held was adorned with glowing razor-sharp blades and part of it was a tube with gren energy flickering here and there.
Nagosh knew what that was, as did the rest.
“Necron... I should have known.”
“Perhaaaps you should haaave, Rakul Manek. But now, it is too late to withdraaaw. Now... would you like to look around?”
Rakul seemed kinda uneasy about it knowing its name.
The question caught all of them off-guard. Gobroz spoke:
“I aaaasked if you waaaanted to look around, ork flaaashgit Gobroz. I think this plaaaace is quite nice, but I need another oppinion.”
“What kind of trick is this?!”
“No trick, Nebulon, bloodletter of Khorne. My eyes and eaaaars are everywhere,” seemingly to illustrate its point, several of the spider-spies appeared, “I know aaaall.”
“I'z still dun't know why you'z wud want us ta check out dis place.”
“Well... I aaaaam lonely down here, waaarboss Nagosh Ubzug.”
“Yes, lonely! I woke up from my imprisoning slumber two centuries ago... and none of my brethren did the same.”
The Necron lord raised his staff and green orbs appeared all around them... showing sarcophagi-like objects.
“Okay... we'z outnumba'd.”
“Boss obviuz strikez back. Wait, how comez you'z can talk? And who are ya?”
“Well... I caaall myself Tartaro. I never was a very obedient lord, you see.”
Rakul raised an eyebrow under his helmet. How come he could say the 'A' in names normally?
“What do you mean? You killed too much?”
“That doesn't make sense, master.”
“No, no, no! My kill-count waaaas fine. At first, anyway. But I started thinking... which should haaave been impossible.” without warning, the lord started moving along the path and they followed, “I staaarted doubting my purpose... and the purpose of my brethren. After aaall, the living weren't all baaad. Like butterflies for exaaample. Butterflies aaare cute... aaanyway, I started slaaacking off, you could say. Stopped killing everything. I alwaaaays left a few living beings after my purificaaaations. Especially butterflies and some plaaaants.”
“And your Stargods got angry, I presume?”
“Well, yes. Aaand they then locked me, along with the rest of my brethren, down here. We were the first to be sealed, in faaact.”
“An' ya woke up?”
“Yes. Aaand I have been waaalking here and there for centuries, waiting for the rest.”
“Dat'z not cul.”
During this conversation, Drakk spotted another pedestal, with a red 'buttuny bit' this time.
“Uhhh, wot'z dis do?”
Tartaro turned his mechanical head to the grot.
“Hmmm... I never noticed thaaat one.”
Gobroz was amused:
“You'z didn't noteic it... in centureez?”
“My opticaaal receptors aaare not aaas good aaas they used to be. Click it.”
And Drakk did so.
The panel flashed and ancient machinery started working. Raw energy was directed into the sarcophagi and their inhabitants started waking up. Their double-lids shot open and Necrons like no others emerged.
By looks, the automatons were like armoured humans. Helmet like heads, resembling those found on Imperial Stormtroopers, with a green line of an eye. Their feet resembled boots, their body had decorations on it. And their gauss flayers were compressed to the size of a large lasrifle.
“They live! THEY LIIIIIVE! My brethren! I'll haave to thank you more properly laaater.”
The group was surprised, to say the least.
“Oy, deze ain't skeletun boyz!”
“Not aaanymore, waaarboss. I... upgraaaded them, you could saaay.”
“The C'Tan I served was the master of technology. The Void Dragon.”
“Which is rumoured to be on Mars...” muttered Rakul to himself.
“Since I knew how to reshaaape them, I did. Took me a century, but the results are worth it. And these are my new Shockwarriors.”
“What an original name...”
“Ummm... I wouldn't mock them right now, master.”
Nebulon already counted a hundred at least. And more were coming to life by the minute.
“Wait... why didn't ya upgreid yerself.”
“Well, Nagosh... I did not haaave the testicles for it... literaaally.”
Gobroz was getting nervous.
“Okay... so, you'z got yourz frendz bak... can we'z go now?”
“Go? Where would you waaant to go?”
“To the surface. By the fastest route.”
“I aaam afraaaid thaaat won't be possible. You see, while I have my brethren... I aaam not much of an AI prograaammer... they aaare still stupid.”
“And what does that have to do with us?”
“You aaare going to keep me compaaany.”
Rakul wanted to protest... but the warriors readied their gauss flayers, so he stayed silent.
Nagosh, however, did protest:
“Oy! I'z ain't gunna stay 'ere an' make companey fer sum bag o' irony bonez!”
“Aaand whaat caan you do about it?”
The big ork grinned.
“We'z challinge ya to a battle!”
The others replied with a 'What?!' or 'Wot?!'.
“Yeh. Youz and four of yer boyz, agenzt us. You'z can pick da eventy bit. If we'z win, you'z gunna show us a wey outta 'ere. If youz win, we'll stay 'ere.”
Tartaro was silent for a second, but then his eyes flashed.
“So be it. Follow me.”
They followed Tartaro and four of his warriors, which the lord had somehow picked.
After a minute or two, they reached a small round room. Nagosh looked around. There wasn't much in there.
“Oy, dere ain't much roomzez fer fightin' 'ere.”
“Who said we were gonna fight?”
“I choose the event... and today... we're going to boogy!”
The floor started flashing in random colours and a disco ball appeared above them. The Necrons seemed ready.
The heroes seemed utterly confused.
“You've got to be kidding me...”
“He looks serious, master.”
“I aaam. Three rounds.”
“I am not going to do nonsense like this!” Rakul sat down on the cold ground.
“No, Nebulon. Not today.”
Tartaro's voice hinted amusement:
“In thaaat caaase, let me intrpoduce you to the judges. Do not worry, they will judge faaairly.”
Four spy-spiders crawled upon soledges above them, watching.
“Foolish waaarboss. We Necrons haaave our pride! In aaany caaase, let's get this staaarted!”
Tartaro was always the first to move and the others mimicked him.
The lord first made motions with his metallic fingers, resembling circles. He then rotated his upper half and then shot a ray of green lightning into the ceiling, the warriors shot their flayers instead. And he finished the whole debacle with another spin of the torso, this time the other way. The lord then pointed at them, as if challenging them.
“Dis ain't gunna end well...”
“Jus' try, boss. Youz too, Drakk.”
“Right.” said both.
Nagosh started flailing his arms around randomly. Drakk did the same. Gobroz facepalmed.
“Heheheheheh. Let us look aaat the results. First, us.”
The spiders lifted these numbers: nine, nine, nine and... six? Nope, that was just turned upside down.
“And now uz...” the orks got: three, two, one and one.
“First round is ours! One more to go!”
Tartaro's confidence was starting to annoy Nebulon.
“Fine, if ya want to rot here, I don't care. I'm helping the orks.”
The daemon stood up and was now with Nagosh and the rest.
“Reaaady for round two, fools?”
“Fine! Just waaatch this!”
And the 'Crons were at it again. Tartaro this time made slow, jerky movements with his body parts. To the left, to the right, to the ground. He was like some sorta' bugged machine. And since the five behind him copied, it was quite impressive. This time, he finished it with a lightning blast. And again pointed.
“Okay, no silly random stuff this time. Try to have a system!”
Nagosh made slashed with his choppa in all directions and then screamed:
“WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH!!!!!” the caverns shook a bit.
Drakk stood on one of his handsk stood on one of his hands and did all sorts of moves with his legs and other arm.
Gobroz kept turning right round, baby, round, round, round, round
And then came Nebulon. The daemon rotated his axe in every direction and in every position.
But even these efforts combined could not bring victory... and he knew it.
“Make way for a sorcerer!”
Rakul stood up and ran next to Nebulon.
“Thank you, master.”
“I just couldn't let you have all the fun!”
Small warpal flames appeared in his hands and he moved them in a circle, like Tartaro in round one. But after that, he added another small circle and a few movements... and in the air, a flaming mark of Tzeentch floated and then disappeared.
“Hmph! Not baaad. Let's see whaaat the judges thought. Necrons.” the spiders again raised their pieces of paper. Nine, nine, nine and... eight. With a sign of 'Robot dance joke was not funny'. Tartaro wanted to frown.
“And now the winning side!”
When the first spider showed a nine, they rejoiced. A second and third nine brought them utter joy. And the last one made them just scream 'W00T!'.
The lord was just mad now.
“Grrrr.... do not gloaaat yet! One more round!”
“Winna' teiks all!”
Somehow, Drakk was already afraid.
“What Nebulon said!”
Tartaro said nothing more and merely started.
This time, the warriors did their own little robotic choreography, while their lord clasped his metallic hands together. An orb of energy appeared in them and a green mist soon filled the room. Tartaro then powered up the disco ball above and it sparkled all around. The lord then did an improvised moonwalk, followed a twenty second long spin. And this time, he finished it epicly. By somehow throwing away his cape and letting green lightnin g fill the room in a display of utter epicness and awesomesauce.
The heroes were amazed, but not discouraged. Nebulon called everyone closer and then whispered his 'battle plan' to them.
“I'z like dat!”
“Yeh, wot da boss sed!”
“Won't it be dangeruz?”
“No, Nebulon knows what he's doing... right?”
“Of course! Let's get luggin'!”
“My wordz exaktly! Let'z show 'em!”
They stood again next to each other. All were grinning, even though Rakul's grin was hidden by the sorcerer's helmet.
“Thaaat can't be good.”
Nagosh started yet again:
“Ya bet it can't! Cuz da orkz is comin'!” he stomped his feet in a rhytm, “cuz we'z gunna shoot, stomp, chomp and smash! We'z da new WAAAAAAAGHHHHHH!!!!!”
He also slashed with his choppa and released a hailstorm of bullets from his arm-shoota.
Drakk did some mad break dancing... somehow.
Gobroz... pointed to the left... then to the right and finally to the sky, Elvis style. Epicness.
Rakul and Nebulon had a sorcerous show of flame and doombolts. Coolsville.
And then came the grand finale!
Nebulon leapt on top of Nagosh's shoulders. Rakul wall-jumped on top of Nebulon's. Gobroz jumped and was pulled up with Nebulon's help and Drakk... was thrown upward by Nagosh, hitting his head on the ceiling in the process. And so they stood, a tower of heroes.
And then they jumped down, one by one.
“Hmmm... I aaadmit, thaat waaas not haaalf baaad. But you shaaall still lose.”
“We will see.”
“Indeed, sorcerer. Results, pronto!”
Necrons got... ten, ten, ten and ten.
Tartaro already saw their defeat. He could feel it in the necromantel of his body... and then came their points. Four of the same number. Higher than nine. All four were... elevens.
Tartaro's jaw would have fallen to the floor, if it wasn't firmly attached. The five started jumping in victory. When their little celebration ended, Nagosh spoke:
“Hahahahaaaah! We'z win! Now, youz gunna teik us to da surfeic!”
“Ohhhhh.... fine... and I'll stay here for eternity... alone.“
They all suddenly felt sad about the skeleton's situation... the poor guy only wanted friends. And Rakul spoke, wisdom with him:
“Well, there isn't reallky anything, that would keep you from emerging on the surface, is there?”
After this, the lord's eyes flashed.
The (inevitably failing) rescue plans were still under way, when part of the mountain near them collapsed. And from it, a metallic force before unseen rushed forward, seemingly ready to destroy all in their path.
The forces outside readied their minimal forces... when there came the roar of a certain ork. And out from the entrance came Three orks, a Necron lord a sorcerer and a Bloodletter champion could be seen among the supposed Necrons.
Nagosh waved over to a certain command post, along with Rakul. Three Chaos lords, a Tau commander and a bald human were more than surprised.
But one creature of the whole lot didn't give a damn about the whole Necron army. That creature, was a daemonette by the name of Mithara.
She ran straight for him, knocking away any warrior slow enough to not dodge in time. Unfortunately... warboss Nagosh Ubzug was also in her way. And somehow, she effortlessly picked the ork up and threw him in a certain direction, where he impacted a Tau battlesuit.
She then threw her arms around her knight in black fur. He looked downwards, she looked upwards. A tear was in her eye.
“Don't you ever... EVER... scare me like that again, Nebyyyy!”
“I won't, my little cutie, I won't.”
The rest watched the romantic scene. Gobroz and Rakul let out tears of manliness.
Last edited by Tau22; 06-23-09 at 12:09 AM.