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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-03-16, 04:42 PM Thread Starter
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Default The Emperor's Guidance

I spend a fair amount of time on B&C's Sororitas board when I'm in a 40k mood and they started a little thread about "bloopers" for the girls (things like Vandire's conversion field not working when he demonstrated his "divine protection") and the idea of a rather humorous moment prompted this out of me:


Cardinal Thran Gelph was lost. Not that he wanted to admit it of course, but at some point the band of Sororitas he led had become hopelessly lost. All around them the local flora waved in the breeze, almost as if it was mocking him. He turned from the map on his pictslate to the sound of footsteps approaching him and his eyes met those of Sister Superior Heneretta. His frown deeped as he recognized the look on her face.

"Cardinal, are we lost?"

"We are not lost! We've merely been misdirected by some kind of foul chaos witchery!"

She tilted her head just a little, her expression not unlike a mother looking down on her child, "So we are lost then."

He sputtered, his face turning a shade of red that matched his robes perfectly.

"I'll have my squad question the locals in the village we just passed then. I'm sure we'll find our way, or find the source of this witchery you spoke of."

"You shall do no such thing!" Several of the Battle Sisters present looked up from their positions, some had been praying while others maintained vigil for any signs of enemy movement but now their eyes were focused on the Cardinal. "Now get back in position before I turn this whole formation around and take us back to the drop site!"

The Sister Superior's face was emotionless save for a rather amused twinkle in her eyes, "As you wish Cardinal."

As she left the man turned back to his pictslate while muttering to himself about the nerve to imply that he could be lost. The gall to think that a faithful Imperial Servant like himself would need directions!

Last edited by Dave T Hobbit; 05-04-16 at 11:56 AM. Reason: Stripped Quote so people can quote
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-04-16, 02:00 PM
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In the grim darkness of the far future... some things don't change!

I do like the blooper moments, Ciaphus Cain of course being a great source of some heroic bloopers that just happened to save the day.


Check out my Imperial Guard Battle-Group-in-the-making as it slowly takes form! Located just here:

And my collection of all things - particularly Grey Knights; Guard and Adeptus Mechanicus:
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-04-16, 05:30 PM
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Amusing read, Zion, the foul chaos witchery is strong with this cardinal XD. I like your portrayal of the sisters of the battle. I could already get a sense of their regal and martial behavior just through the few sentences of dialogue you provided. Thumbs up .

“Evil is relative…You can’t hang a sign on it. You can’t touch it or taste it or cut it with a sword. Evil depends on where you are standing, pointing your indicting finger.”
-Glen Cook, The Black Company

Tales of Heroism and Bravery, in the 41st Millennium and the Old World. Perhaps some Realm Gate Wars in the future .

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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-04-16, 05:52 PM Thread Starter
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Glad to hear people liked it. And I'm REALLY glad my Sisters came across feeling like Sisters. Emperor forbid they came across as Guardsmen.
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