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post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 05-28-08, 01:46 PM Thread Starter
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Default The Horus Heresy. Prologue

Man, what if the Horus Heresy was not how it seemed to be perceived.
Imaginably different from the verses known to man. The crusades inevitable demise might have come upon from the simplest of things. Imagine the anger a father might generate in one from poorly expressed views or bloody annoying habits. Imagine how it feels to be angered by such small yet deadly actions and the promises one makes of running away, sulking in their room or throwing a tantrum. Well, imagine all those things, the embarrasement you felt when your father dropped you off at school in a run down car, the crappy 60's music he plays when your friends are over and hes always there to remind your mother when she forgetts you have homework from school. Don't you just want to throw the biggest tantrum the universe ever saw and chuck a fit huge enough to destroy a galactic Empire? Well maybe, just maybe that was what Horus did.

“He he he” The Emperor snuck up to Horus while he was chatting to friends on the net.
Suddenly the Emperor grabbed hold of Horus's head phones and threw them off with the strength of a titan.
Horus turned ubruptly to stare at his father in complete annoyance.
The Emperor of Mankind kneeled face to face with the Primarch Horus, wearing a cheap plastic Darth Vader face mask.
“Horus my son! I am your father!” The Emperor of mankind proceeded to make deep breathing noises behind his mask.
“Dad! Go away! Can't you see i'm busy!”
“He he he!” The Emperor stood upright revealing his awesome God like appearance. Vertically Golden lines sewn into his silver mailed garment shining like a thousand suns.
“Dad! Wats with the stupid robe? Its so annoying!”
“Horus.” Calmly boomed the Emperors voice, flowing like a stream running through a mountain and hundreds of leaves shaking in the mighty autumn wind.
“I thought I said 10 minutes checking your emails.”
“But dad! I'm writing my novel!” Horus quickly thumbed the alt-tab button and the screen resumed to a word document, evidently half started.
“Why don't you go outside and feel the fresh air, meet real people? Like your other brothers?” The Emperor asked.
“No, I don't want to, plus Fulgrim stays in the palace.”
“Fulgrim? What is Fulgrim up to these days my son?” The Emperor continued to make deep vader noises.
“Studying. He wants perfect scores for his next exam.”


Suddenly Magnus The Red burst into the room with the mighty Leman Russ trailing behind him, shouldering an oversized giant Frost Axe.
“Daaad! Leman hit me! Its not fair!”
“Bullshit! You whiny little Bastard! The little pussies lying!”
“No I'm not, no I'm not! Look dad! Leman hit me!”
Magnus presented his mangled cut open arm to his father.
The Emperor glanced over at Leman Russ questiongly.
“If you did not hit him, then why is your Frost Axe dripping blood?”
Leman guiltily looked at his Axe and then at the floor.
“Magnus the scrawny bastard was playing with warp spawned demons and sorcerous powers!”
Magnus looked away.
“Leman Russ, you must stop injuring your brothers, one of these days some one will lose an artery. Its funny until some one loses an organ!”
Leman Russ broke into furious laughter.
“Then its Hilarious!” Horus and Russ Shouted simultaneously cracking up laughing.
“Not fair!” Magnus burst out of the room crying.
“Hey Mag! Coming to my meeting later?” Horus yelled after him.
“Russ coming?” Returned Magnus's voice from behind the door.
“Nah! I gotter beat up some o' em people! And get wasted!”
“Ok fine I'm coming” shouted Magnus before he bolted off with Russ at his heels.

The Emperor looked over curiously at Horus.
“Leman started drinking again Horus?”
“Well he is over 18 and you can't control us forever dad! So leave me alone!”
“And what is this meeting your having? Am I invited?”
“Uh...No, sorry dad, just a brotherly thing, you know.”
The study door opened with The Lion strolling in.
“Aw crap! Horus is always on the stupid computer! Fine, I don't care!”
The Lion retreated back out of the room.
“Hey! Lion! You coming to the meeting?”
“What? No, me 'n San are going out tonight. Meeting chicks, you should come. Oh yeah forgot, you're glued to the bloody computer!”

This is the beginning and if any one has any objections to the madness, please speak up. Or I won't stop.

Alle's Klar? Herr Kommissar
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post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 07-03-08, 02:44 PM
 
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Dude i love it

think its really funny, pleaer god keep going

:g ood:
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post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 07-03-08, 08:52 PM
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wow... that is godly! More more more!!



"Employ your time in improving yourself by other men's writings, so that you shall gain easily what others have labored hard for."
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post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 07-03-08, 08:54 PM
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Nice. while it's not the first thing I've seen like this, it is probably the best. I want the next part!
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