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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-21-12, 03:39 AM Thread Starter
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Default Checking in with father.

Checking in with father.

How far have I fallen? The end is nigh. I have seen the darkness and it envelopes me. I am tired and lonely, empty and forsaken.
The Emperor has done this to me, curse his two faced nature.

The false light of the Emperor once deceived me, but now I know. He will reap the benefits of his falseness, of this I am sure.

I stand in fron of his seplicure and bear witness of his immortality. I laugh without fear because I see how his victory has cost him.

Sweet vengeance. I am yoked to Him through his gene-seed; he is my father. I hate the fact that I was created only for war. If war is the only reason why I have been born than war is what I will bring. I laugh at the thought.

Nothing can stand in the way of one such as I. I am angry and bitter and callous to the cries of those who worship him.

As I turn from His stasis-chamber I can barely hear his thoughts toward me. He asks me to forgive him. For me to remember mercy.

I turn on my heel and stalk back to the storm glass of his chamber. I place my hands upon the thick glass and direct my thoughts into his strong mind.

Did you forgive Horus or Largar or me? Did you have mercy upon us? In the stillness of the moment I can feel the sadness deep within his ancient chest.

He wishes he were whole again. He wishes he could slay me, but he cannot for he is now a dependent; good for nothing but the useless prayers of the hopeless.

The hall is nearly barren except for his meager guard. They do not know I am here, for if they did they would seek to slay me.

My desire is not to fight them. My desire is not to end the hypocritical life of the corpse-emperor. No, I only want to see the face of my father once more and feel the shame he now bears.

My spirit man is invisible to the naked eye, but to the keen mind of the Emperor my fire blazes like a burning sun.

I can feel his aching heart and I am pleased by it.

'Magnus.' he says. I can hear his once strong voice in my mind.

'Yes father.' I answer before I turn and walk away.

A good reputation take a long time to build, but only a moment to destroy. Wow, that's deep! Check out the H.O.E.S. short story competition.
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-21-12, 03:48 AM
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Loved it, very interesting, I think you captured the character very well.

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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-27-12, 11:12 AM
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Very fitting portrayel of Magnus. I think he has the right to be most bitter of all the traitors. He warned the Emperor of Horus only to be named a heretic. Horus sent the Space Wolves to kill him. Then Tzeentch, his new master turned his Legion to dust.

"Fetch me another plaything. This one seems to have broken." -Urien Rakarth

Space Marine- "This planet is ours, witch."
Eldar- "No ... This planet is theirs ..."
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-28-12, 01:07 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Archon Dan View Post
Very fitting portrayel of Magnus. I think he has the right to be most bitter of all the traitors. He warned the Emperor of Horus only to be named a heretic. Horus sent the Space Wolves to kill him. Then Tzeentch, his new master turned his Legion to dust.
The Emperor sent the wolves. That is what makes it all the more painful for Magnus. I do have a lot more Thousand Suns to unleash upon you all; if I can find the time.

A good reputation take a long time to build, but only a moment to destroy. Wow, that's deep! Check out the H.O.E.S. short story competition.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 03-28-12, 02:16 AM
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The Emperor sent Space Wolves to capture Magnus. Horus then tricked them to try to kill him instead. But I guess from Magnus' perspective, the Emperor ordered the kill. I look forward to that. I'll just have to look up your other works as time permits.

"Fetch me another plaything. This one seems to have broken." -Urien Rakarth

Space Marine- "This planet is ours, witch."
Eldar- "No ... This planet is theirs ..."
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