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post #4731 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-22-13, 07:29 PM
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Thanks for the condolences, lads.

I'm in shock - I don't want to get revenge or anything, that's not who I am - I love her, so very much. And she claims to love me, but I don't understand how she can. I want her back, I'm at a complete loss as to what I should do.

Nyctophobia- Fear of the Dark Angel.

"No one ever spoke about of those two absent brothers. Their separate tragedies had seemed like aberrations. Had they, in fact, been warnings that no one had heeded?"

'Killing a man is like fucking, boy, only instead of giving life you take it. You experience the ecstasy of penetration as your warhead enters the enemy's belly and the shaft follows. You see the whites of his eyes roll inside the sockets of his helmet. You feel his knees give way beneath him and the weight of his faltering flesh draw down the point of your spear. Are you picturing this?'
'Yes, lord.'
'Is your dick hard yet?'
'No, lord.'
''What? You've got your spear in a man's guts and your dog isn't stiff? What are you, a woman?'
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post #4732 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-22-13, 08:09 PM
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Well Bro. It's down to you.

BUT. I am some random guy on the web, this is my opionion.

I don't see how anyone who loves anyone could do that to them. It smacks of lies and cowardice, not willing to face up to the damage she has done to you by saying that.

If it was me I would never be able to trust her again, I could never believe her and never get the thoughts of what she has done out of my head.

It happened to me before so I know how you feel. I cut my losses and ran. The gym is always there for you. That's where I went. I saw that same chick a year or so later and I walked away the bigger man. (Literally lol)

It hurts and you want to believe its true and that some slaneshi thing got in her mind and made her do it but the bottom line is she used your trust, she betrayed you and deserves nothing less than your contempt.

Hard words I know. You are better that that. Plenty more trees in the woods buddy.

Stay happy.

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post #4733 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-22-13, 09:39 PM
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@dark angel , you're in a tough spot right now and I can totally understand why you feel that you should give it another chance - But trust me on this, if never anything else: Don't.

I forgave my ex after having cheated on my through 2 years. I believed that it was partially my fault, and that if I had done more, she wouldn't have done it. I loved her - I loved her oh so dearly. I couldn't fathom my life without her. I wanted to take the problem on my shoulders, if only it meant that I could hug her, kiss her and be with her again.

I wanted to leave it all behind and believe her when she said that she loved me. That she would never do it again. And I did. I truly did.

But it was always in the back of my mind. Whenever she wrote a text message, whenever she took the phone in the evenings, it reemerged. I didn't dare ask her or tell her, as I would seem like the evil boyfriend who wanted to control her - So I kept it inside. I stayed my course like this for months, just for the sake of peace and love in the relationship. A chance to return to how it once was.

4 months went by and I found out, by accident, that she had been unfaithful again. It was all a lie - I had worn myself down and taken the problem on me for nothing. If you can believe it, it was more devastating than the first time. It tore me to pieces.

Now I do believe it when she says that she loves you - But not enough to never do it again. If she can do it from the start and to the end, it's simply her nature. I know you don't want to hear it and ultimately it's up to you. But you have to decide if you go the same route that I did and never completely trust her again - If that is the case, you are missing the most important part of the triforce that is a relationship; Love, respect and, most importantly, trust.

You have my dearest condolences and if you wish to take this to the PM stage, do feel free and I will gladly talk about it. But listen to a like-minded scarred veteran; Don't take her back. You will only break yourself in the end by doing so.

I hope you feel better in the morning - Otherwise, I'm sure a lot of people here are here for you.
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post #4734 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-22-13, 10:07 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nordicus View Post
@dark angel , you're in a tough spot right now and I can totally understand why you feel that you should give it another chance - But trust me on this, if never anything else: Don't.

I forgave my ex after having cheated on my through 2 years. I believed that it was partially my fault, and that if I had done more, she wouldn't have done it. I loved her - I loved her oh so dearly. I couldn't fathom my life without her. I wanted to take the problem on my shoulders, if only it meant that I could hug her, kiss her and be with her again.

I wanted to leave it all behind and believe her when she said that she loved me. That she would never do it again. And I did. I truly did.

But it was always in the back of my mind. Whenever she wrote a text message, whenever she took the phone in the evenings, it reemerged. I didn't dare ask her or tell her, as I would seem like the evil boyfriend who wanted to control her - So I kept it inside. I stayed my course like this for months, just for the sake of peace and love in the relationship. A chance to return to how it once was.

4 months went by and I found out, by accident, that she had been unfaithful again. It was all a lie - I had worn myself down and taken the problem on me for nothing. If you can believe it, it was more devastating than the first time. It tore me to pieces.

Now I do believe it when she says that she loves you - But not enough to never do it again. If she can do it from the start and to the end, it's simply her nature. I know you don't want to hear it and ultimately it's up to you. But you have to decide if you go the same route that I did and never completely trust her again - If that is the case, you are missing the most important part of the triforce that is a relationship; Love, respect and, most importantly, trust.

You have my dearest condolences and if you wish to take this to the PM stage, do feel free and I will gladly talk about it. But listen to a like-minded scarred veteran; Don't take her back. You will only break yourself in the end by doing so.

I hope you feel better in the morning - Otherwise, I'm sure a lot of people here are here for you.
Very well said, Nord.

It's not worth the constant thoughts of "is she, isn't she?". Trust us mate, as hard as it may seem, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and then shoulders back and chin up. You're better than all of this.


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post #4735 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-22-13, 10:57 PM
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Well spoken Nord. I been in that boat too bro. Not a nice place to be. At least we can empathise with Dark Angel.

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post #4736 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-23-13, 06:31 AM
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IMHO, venting can be useful (i.e. not totally pointless), but it's better if it leads to us figuring out if there were any mistakes/what they were/what caused them/etc and learn from it so that it hopefully doesn't mess us up (at least as much) again.

I'm not being cynical, glib or underestimating anyone's pain (although I will never know what it actually feels like), I'm trying to be supportive and help people move on (i.e. bad stuff happens, but it doesn't have to screw us up forever).

Hang in there, there's loads of good advice + support from the caring people here.

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post #4737 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-23-13, 07:54 AM
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My immediate superior at work is turning into a belittling fucking cunt and needs a smack.
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post #4738 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-24-13, 12:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dark angel View Post
Thanks for the condolences, lads.

I'm in shock - I don't want to get revenge or anything, that's not who I am - I love her, so very much. And she claims to love me, but I don't understand how she can. I want her back, I'm at a complete loss as to what I should do.

I've been there many a time unfortunately - I've learnt that people don't change. They claim they can/will, but they don't. It's not their fault, it is a simple character flaw. The love she says she feels for you is (IMHO) affection and love of the stability you have provided in your time together, but to say it is 'love' is simply untrue - who could possibly do such a terrible thing to someone they truly love? And even if she does 'love' you, you are simply not right for each other as you hold different values, ie; you are hurt that she could do such a thing while she did it without TRULY giving it a good think.

Long and the short of it - if she did it once, she could do it again - you can never trust her as you once did. Someone who could cheat on their other half and keep it under wraps for so long does not DESERVE the trust that one places in them.

Be glad you found out, take your time and gradually pick yourself up and move on. Its the only thing to do.
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post #4739 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-24-13, 07:22 PM
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Thanks, guys. I can't exactly turn to anyone else. My friends are unsympathetic; they all said that this would happen, or was happening. I disregarded everything that they said - Told 'em that she wasn't like that - How wrong was I.. And, I don't particularly want to get my family involved in my own business. So you're all I have.

I've been with her through everything, too. She was assaulted, I picked up the pieces. Her sister passed away, I held her. Her parents weren't supportive, I told her that she could do it. I've not been perfect to her - But I've been the best that I possibly could be, since we got together. And now it's all been thrown back in my face, and I feel like everything's falling down around me. She's my first real love, I'd do anything for her. I can't stop thinking about the things they said, did. It's keeping me awake, stressed and depressed.

Fuck my life.

Nyctophobia- Fear of the Dark Angel.

"No one ever spoke about of those two absent brothers. Their separate tragedies had seemed like aberrations. Had they, in fact, been warnings that no one had heeded?"

'Killing a man is like fucking, boy, only instead of giving life you take it. You experience the ecstasy of penetration as your warhead enters the enemy's belly and the shaft follows. You see the whites of his eyes roll inside the sockets of his helmet. You feel his knees give way beneath him and the weight of his faltering flesh draw down the point of your spear. Are you picturing this?'
'Yes, lord.'
'Is your dick hard yet?'
'No, lord.'
''What? You've got your spear in a man's guts and your dog isn't stiff? What are you, a woman?'
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post #4740 of 6057 (permalink) Old 10-24-13, 08:10 PM
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Hitting me hard in the feels dude.

All I can say is stay positive, there is always a silver lining and it will show itself.

I am happy for you to PM me if you want a more candid chat bro.

W-L-D
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