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Thread: Heresy Online Expeditious Stories 3: Betrayal Reply to Thread
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  Topic Review (Newest First)
03-27-11 11:39 PM
Kaiden Hey guys, great stories this month. I'm not doing one this month, but I am branching out into audiobook work, so if anyone wants thier story read and linked just let me know. Keep the great work coming
03-27-11 10:31 PM
Stephen_Newman I know. I found the word count to be very restricting. Even now I am empted to write out the full version of my short story just to see how it looks in full.

Good luck to everyone in the upcoming voting!
03-27-11 04:49 PM
ckcrawford Thanks C'tan Chimera. When I was first writing it I was trying to make everyone else the traitor look a likes. But as I hit the middle of my story, I was like... this is going to be impossible to salvage these fellas in a good light.

I'm liking the writings so far. So much damn work in only 1000 or less words! Thats awesome.
03-27-11 03:30 PM
Boc 13.5 more hours to go! Get-a-writing those of you that haven't finished!
03-27-11 02:53 PM
C'Tan Chimera That's a good one, Crawford! It's cool to see an Imperial that while still a loyalist at heart knows that something is screwed up big time with the Imperium.
03-27-11 06:38 AM
ckcrawford Sorry, hope I made it in time, I may be half an hour late due to some driving I had to do in order to stop at a hotel and post this. I hope its still okay. Word Count: 1058 not including title.

Put to Rest

Imperial Record: Sergeant Kantanus’ last words as a loyal astartes in the Delta Chapter.

In the planet of Proximo, close to the Western Imperial outskirts lay the world I once grew up as a kid. The Imperium had lost it a few decades ago to rebellion. But now it laid purified of that hate. Ruled by a new governor and controlled by the same people we will never forget… And now we will be looked at as the traitors we appear to be… for doing the right thing. For truly fighting for the Imperium… for our Emperor.


As I lay here I cannot help but think all the thoughts of my life as the blood drips from my sword. As the smoke from my bolt pistol whispers through the cold and windy air, I pray that the doubt of our deeds also blows easily away. A planet full of sinners, and the corrupt. Now a graveyard of righteousness. Each dead body a form of justice.

I remember so; before I was taken away from the astartes. This world controlled by the rich and corrupt. Their own children, bullied the children of lesser families. These lesser families that had fought and died for the Imperium since the Great Betrayal. I must confess, we we’re all weak and pathetic. Every attempt to defend ourselves met with the same response that the rest of the traitors of the Imperium would receive.

And now we we’re returning to a world that had been won back by our parents, families, friends. We should have killed them all, but we let them live and get away. So much for mercy. It was only by the will of the Emperor’s and his good grace that the Delta Chapter came upon our world as we had won it back. To be taken to fulfill our right to live amongst the other Imperial Worlds. Several thousand of our patriots had been taken aboard.

The Delta Chapter had almost suffered anhilation against the greenskins. But they were still able to maintain most of their geneseed intact. As such, it appeared to be that our Chapter Master had decided to lower the common acceptable mental conditions it required to be an astartes. The aspirants were still weeded out by the thousands, leaving the very few physically gifted to pick up where the chapter left up.

After two decades of training and pushing back the orks from our sector, we had received word that the world of Proximo had been quelled from its rebellion. A mystery to our Chapter Master who had just recruited us into his Chapter, and given his reports the Imperial Administrum, this world had maintained its loyalty intact.

As we got to the world of Proximo… we could not believe our eyes. The cruel and corrupt leaders we had previously thrown off from power had once again returned… with Vengeance. Men of all ages and sizes were on the street dragging huge piles of stones with ropes. They had all been forced into slavery for their suppose treachery as heretics of the Imperium. Imperial Guardsmen of the Mordian Guard formed firing squads, firing at those who refused or just couldn’t work. Those men too old or tired to even stand up to face their fate in the firing squads were shot point blank in the face with laspistols of the officers.

We could not see any of the females of our world. Had they all been killed? Our Chapter Master decided to meet with the new Governor of Proximo. And so we did. Upon landing on the planet we had witnessed the horror of the planet it once was. Pictures of the Govenor posted all over the city walls claiming him a hero.

Knowing it was probably best that only him and his 1st company go in to the Govenor’s Palace alone, he left us to patrol the planet. Of the chapter, only the Chapter Master and the 1st company were not from this planet.

As we patrolled the planet, we saw more and more how gruesome this Imperium actually was. How could the Emperor and his Imperium allow something like this to happen?

And then that was when we saw it. We had finally discovered what had happened to the women of our planet as we walked through a market place that had soon become a sick and perverse version of a brothel. Rich men in expensive gounds would purchase these individuals and do anything they pleased with them. The only thing they had to do was dispose of the bodies by throwing them into a pit. My men were all already disgusted.

Memories… moments… things we had not been properly prepared to take on before we fully became astartes. I had touched the face of one of the bodies in the pits. Pale rotten skin, with green eyes, brown hair. I had once known these features. A girl I had once loved, that I knew I would never have the chance to have.

It’s when I felt it. Tears rolled down my eyes. My body turned boiling hot, my body started to shake as I could only feel violent thoughts run through my mind. I saw bodies being ripped apart as I ripped parts of my armor off. I took my blade and started to cut into my skin. I could barely recognize that my men around me were doing the same. If it were not for their chilling screams and cries I would have simply ignored them. The crowd was getting fed up of our stay, and it was not long before they had nothing more to say about it.

I don’t know exactly what we did, but we did it. We killed every living being in the capital. Hacking everything alive down… both slave, soldier, and anyone standing in our way… even our Chapter Master… He tried to save us. Tried to warn us of what we were doing. But we could not listen. The voice of justice had been ignored and the voice of vengeance had come to set this right. So he died, him and his first company. They did not understand. How could they?

Only the Emperor knows the Justice we serve. We still fight for him. But not for his false Imperium. Glory to the “True Imperium!”
03-25-11 10:48 PM
Boc Raz you aren't invited

I kid I kid
03-25-11 04:00 PM
Raziel4707 Well I might just do that, Mr Boc :D
03-23-11 01:36 PM
Boc Okay, first post has been updated with all of the entries so far. We're already sitting at 10 with still a week to go, so the competition has kept growing!

As a reminder, the deadline is Sunday 27 March! Keep writing!
03-23-11 02:50 AM
C'Tan Chimera I shied away from doing more xeno-fluff because I've basically done that twice in a row now. I don't want to be -too- predictable.
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