| Topic Review (Newest First) |
| 09-10-12 05:37 AM | |
| Ambush Beast |
Hi Quote:
Originally Posted by VixusKragov
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Very good. It seems like a cliche to say this but the story is hauntingly beautiful. I know I'm just throwing more praise on to the pile at this point, but you've got some serious talent.
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| 09-09-12 07:12 PM | |
| VixusKragov | Very good. It seems like a cliche to say this but the story is hauntingly beautiful. I know I'm just throwing more praise on to the pile at this point, but you've got some serious talent. |
| 09-09-12 03:30 PM | |
| Ambush Beast |
Hello Quote:
Originally Posted by maelstrom48
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First original work I've read on here, and I have to say, I'm encouraged! You have a talent for description. I actually liked how you alternated between the old man's emotion and the events that caused it. The ending leaves me a little uncertain--did the events of the story actually take place? If so, how did he end up in the hospital? But I feel maybe it makes more sense that he murdered his daughter and, in his ensuing coma, dreamed up the purgatory he's trapped in. Not sure; some clarity would be nice. All the same, I again admire your description of his emotional state throughout.
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| 09-07-12 11:48 AM | |
| Dave T Hobbit | I think the ending works better without confirmation of whether he is mad or not. |
| 09-07-12 02:32 AM | |
| maelstrom48 | First original work I've read on here, and I have to say, I'm encouraged! You have a talent for description. I actually liked how you alternated between the old man's emotion and the events that caused it. The ending leaves me a little uncertain--did the events of the story actually take place? If so, how did he end up in the hospital? But I feel maybe it makes more sense that he murdered his daughter and, in his ensuing coma, dreamed up the purgatory he's trapped in. Not sure; some clarity would be nice. All the same, I again admire your description of his emotional state throughout. |
| 09-06-12 11:56 PM | |
| Ambush Beast |
I was rummaging through my old stuff and found this. Hope you like it. From the archives. |
| 01-17-12 09:47 AM | |
| Pusser | Chills down my spine... |
| 01-17-12 09:39 AM | |
| gothik |
Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatOtherGuy
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Do not fear minion, my omnipresent eye is always scanning this section... When it feels like it.
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| 01-17-12 04:11 AM | |
| Ambush Beast |
lol Quote:
Originally Posted by ThatOtherGuy
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Do not fear minion, my omnipresent eye is always scanning this section... When it feels like it.
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| 01-17-12 02:03 AM | |
| ThatOtherGuy |
Quote:
Originally Posted by Adrian
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It always feels good to know you are there keeping vigil over O.W. and the minions scurrying about in the darkness within. Smile, smile.
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