The Orks
WAAAGH!!!
- Ork battlecry
We don’t fight fer food, or fer teef, or guns, or cos we’s told to fight. We fight cos we woz born to fight. And win.
- Grukk, Ork Boy
'Oomans are pink and soft, not green and tough like da Boyz. They'z all the same size, too - No big'uns or little'uns, so they'z always arguing about who's in charge, 'cos there's no way of telling 'cept for badges an' ooniforms and fings. Anuvver fing - when they do sumfink, they try to make it look like somfink else to confuse everybody. When one of 'em wants to lord it over the uvvers, 'e says "I'm very speshul so'z you gotta worship me", or "I know summink wot you lot don't know, so yer better lissen good". Da funny fing is, 'arf of 'em believe it and da over 'arf don't, so 'e 'as to hit 'em all anyway or run fer it. Wot a lot of mukkin' about if yer asks me. An' while they'z all arguin' wiv each other over who's da Boss, da Orks can sneak up an' clobber da lot.
- Snotgrub's view of humanity and its failings
Let’s stomp some ‘umies!
- Popular Ork saying
We is da Orks. We always win. Espeshully when we win.
- Common Ork saying
Orkses is never beaten in battle. If we win we win, if we die we die so it don't count as defeat. If we runs for it we don't die neither, so we can always cum back for anuvver go, see!
- Commonly held Ork view of warfare
Get ‘em boyz! Dakka dakka dakka! WAAAGH! THE ORKS! WAAAGH!
- Rotgrub, Ork strategist
All Orks is equal, but some Orks are more equal dan others.
- Goff Warboss Bugrat Skumdreg, on accusations of taking more than his fair share of the booty from the latest battle
The best means of defense is attack, an' the best means of attack is a really really big one, right, with lots of boys an' dead big shooty things and what have ya.
- Drekzog, legendary Ork smartboy
Stomp ‘em. Stomp ‘til there is nuthin’ left.
- Battlecry of the Killcrushas before they leveled Tartus VII
Da only lost race I ever heard of woz when Hef crashed his trike in da final stretch of da cross-desert rally. Cost me a few teef, that.
- Nuzzgrond of the Black Skulls
Oi! Stop runnin’ away, yer snivellin’ humies, we got a race on here!
- Skabgutz, Ork Trukker
Da trubble with defendin shacks is dat dey know you’re in dere. So you get tons’a stuff dropped on you before any of ‘em’ll come in for a scrap. An’ when dey do, there’s thousands of ‘em.
- Warlord Mhagdhash Kur Kroksnik, Deth Traks, Armageddon
Da only good ‘ooman is a dead ‘ooman. An’ da only fing better than a dead ‘ooman’z a dyin’ ‘ooman who tells yer where ter find ‘is mates.
- Morglum Necksnapper
We’re da best. Think different do ya? Come and have a go then, ya runty little wimp!
- Gasgrakh, Goff Nob
Evil Sunz like two fings most: Going fast and krumpin’ stuff. Dat’s why we’z so good at it.
- Lugnut of the Bladed Wheels
Bought me a deffblasta off Rotskrag earlier. Nice little killa. Just ask Rotskrag, hur hur.
- Fat Druzka, Bad Moon Flash Git
Live off the land. Go to find war. Kill wot comes close. The old ways are best.
- Grodd, Snakebite Runtherd
Us Blood Axes have learnt a lot from da humies. How best ta kill ‘em, for example…
- Korporal Snagbrat of the Dreadblade Kommandos
Wot, this? Naw, I’ve had this fer ages. Of course the paint’s still wet, it’s me favorite. Sell it to ya if you like. One careful owner.
- ‘Fingaz’ Rutzeg, Deathskull Loota
Some sayz we’z Feral, nomadz they call uz. I just say we’z always marching, konkering we iz…
- Warlord Snagga Snagga
You're rich! You're flashy! You 'ave a proppa Orky stoutness about your belly! And you've got more big, shooty, and dead 'ard gear than any two uvver Orks put together. Da uvver clans orta make way for da Bad Moons!
- Bad Moons clan philosophy
We’ve got our Gargants an’ we’ve got our weapons. Wot ain’t we got? We ain’t got anyfing for target practice iz wot! So I’ll tell you wot we’re gonna do. We’re gonna give da Humies a taste of ‘ot metal death is wot. We’s gonna take Big Gork and Big Mork ‘ere an’ we’s gonna stomp Humie!
- Warlord Dragnatz prepares the Boyz for the Waaargh!
We’s stomped ‘umies, we’s blown up stuff and we’s driven our traks from one end of da world to da uvva. We’s gonna come back next year!
- Bugsplatta Defnik of the Red Wheelz Speed Freeks
Inbound: Dis is Nugrob da Slayer callin’. I got me boyz wiv me. Fort you lot might want to make a deal. You give us a thousand shootas each time we visit, and yer ain’t got no more worries, see?
Governor Kubris: We’re not giving into your outrageous ultimatum – never!
Inbound: Shame about that, cos I got ‘arf a dozen Dreadmobs, and a couple a Gargants wiv me.
-Pause-
Kubris: Let us have a few hours to reconsider.
Inbound: Nah, I feel like lettin’ out the Gargants after all, har har har!
'Ere we go, 'ere we go, 'ere we go, 'ere we go, through the cosmos.
'Ere we go, 'ere we go, 'ere we go, 'ere we go, through infinity.
'Ere we go, 'ere we go, 'ere we go, don't know where till we get there.
- Chant of Orks hitching rides through the warp
Travellin’ through space is boring. Well, boring unless da hulk yer on is full of dem gene-sneakers, or a base fer da Chaos lads wiv da spikes, or already has Boyz on it. Or if humie lootas come callin’, that’s always good fer a bit of sport. Or unless yer have a mutiny or two to pass da time, or unless strange fings start happenin’, which they usually do when yer out in da warp. One time we had some bloody great ugly fing come straight out of Weird Lugwort’s ‘ed! It butchered half da lads, that was pretty entertainin’. Come ter fink of it, space is a pretty good larf. And that’s before yer find yerself a nice new world ta crush!
- Bigmaw, Ork Runtherd
Shooty Deff from da Sky
- Motto of the Vulcha Sqwadron of Bommers
I dunno wot you been told,
Stormboy mobs is mighty bold,
We’re da hardest of da lot,
We make you lot look like Grots.
- Stormboy drill-chant
If ya wanna be big an' mean,
If ya wanna be best an' green,
If ya wanna get da job done fast,
Da Vulcha skwad iz where it's at!
- Lift-off chant of the Vulcha Skwad.
Wot’s faster than a warbuggy, more killy than a warbike, and flies through da air like a bird? I got no bleedin’ idea, but I’m gonna find out.
- Kog da Flymek, pioneer of the Dethkopta
Hit 'em hard, hit 'em low, and give 'em plenty of Dakka
- Kommanda Uzgob (call-sign “Mavarork”) of the Deff Skwadron
Call yerselves Speed Freeks... Hur Hur Hur...
- Da Black Baron, en route to the front line
Right, first I'll take those teef out for yer, dat should help ease da pain in yer leg. Grokkit, hand me that wrench. Now then... Open wide, and say... AAARGH!
- Dok Gutslash
Operate! Operate! Still time to operate!
- Mad Dok Grotsnik
I'm da hand of Gork and Mork, dey sent me to rouse up da boyz to crush and kill 'cos da boyz forgot what dere 'ere for. I woz one of da boyz till da godz smashed me in da 'head an' I 'membered dat Orks is meant to conquer and make slaves of everyfing they don't kill.
I'm da profit of da Waaagh an' whole worlds burn in my boot prints. On Armour-Geddem I led da boyz through da fire deserts and smashed da humies' metal cities to scrap. I fought Yarik, old one-eye at Tartarus, an' he fought good but we smashed iz city too.
I'm death to anyfing that walks or crawls, where I go nothin' stands in my way. We crushed da stunties on Golgotha, an' we caught old one-eye when da speed freeks blew da humies' big tanks ta bits. I let 'im go 'cause good enemies iz 'ard to find, an' Orks need good enemies ta fight like they need meat to eat an' grog ta drink.
I iz more cunning than a Grot an' more killy dan a dread, da boyz dat follow me can't be beat. On Pissenah we jumped da marine-boyz an' our bosspoles was covered in da helmets we took from da dead 'uns. We burned dere port an' killed dere bosses an' left nothin' but ruins behind.
I'm Warlord Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka an' I speak wiv da word of da godz. We iz gonna stomp da 'ooniverse flat an' kill anyfing that fights back. We iz gonna do this coz' we're Orks an' we was made to fight an' win.
- Warlord Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka
I’ll be back…
- Ghazghkull Mag Uruk Thraka after the Second War for Armageddon
Kill them – Kill them all!
- Warlord Ghazghkull Thraka
Da stoopid humies fink we come 'ere coz we wuz Ghazghkull's soljers. We came 'ere to stomp humies, trash dere shacks an' watch 'em burn. Not coz Ghazghkull sez but coz we LIKE doin' it. Now we're gonna do it again...
- Mhagdhash Kur Kroksnik addressing the Deth Traks from the ruins of Hive Hades
He was an avalanche from an unexpected quarter. He was a thunderbolt from a clear sky.
- Commissar Yarrick on Ghazghkull Thraka
I have followed you too far to fail now, Ghazghkull Thraka. I bear the gift of death. You cannot outrun me. There's no place in this universe where you can hide. I have waited a long time for vengeance. I'm tired, but not so tired I cannot kill you. Maybe then I won't see the faces of the dead. Maybe then I'll be able to sleep.
- Commissar Yarrick before the Battle for Golgotha
The green tide of Orkdom is upon us and we are alone. There can be no mercy. No surrender. If we survive this day it will be a miracle.
- Commissar Yarrick at Armageddon
Let the Orks come by the thousand, or by the tens of thousands; we shall be ready for them. This world is the Emperor’s, not theirs, and we shall wash it clean with their blood.
- Pedro Kantor, Master of the Crimson Fists
You know not the valour of the Orks; they believe that the more enemy there are the more glory they will win and the more plunder they will secure.
- Inquisitor Yuan of the Ordo Xenos, addressing the regimental commanders at Gundastol
And at this time
the brazen god of war
cast up a great lord
to lead the savages forth.
- The Book of War
An ork can seem an alarming prospect when first encountered. They stand taller than a man, with hunched, broad shoulders and long arms. They may seem to be heavily muscled, but the fact is their muscle tissue is not as dense as a human’s. In actuality they are considerably weaker than the average man, despite what their appearance suggests. Their skin is thick and coarse and ranges in hue from green to almost black. Portions of their body are covered in stiff, black hair. Their brow is heavy (denoting their lack of intellect) and their little, almost useless eyes have a red cast to them. They have great tusks which jut from their mouths, but they are not sharp and a firm tug will pull them out by the root.
When confronting orks in combat remember their weaknesses and consider the fact that they are but animals, and they have no place in our galaxy where they prey only on the weak and the helpless. After they have seen you with a loaded lasgun and a smile on your face, you can shoot them in the back as they run away!
- “Know Your Foe – Orks,” The Imperial Infantryman’s Uplifting Primer, Chapter 5 Section 1
Provost Major: You claim that the Orks took you by surprise attack? A race, I might add, not noted for their subtlety of tactics.
Lieutenant Gordo: I swear by the Emperor’s immortal benevolence! We had pickets at fifty-pace interals with regular half-hour contacts. There were no reports of enemy activity in our segment. The first we knew, the gate was blown and there were greenskins running all over the fort. Some of them must have sneaked in and killed the sentries before the others attacked.
P-M: You are asking us to believe that an Ork unit infiltrated your position, eliminating the sentries, and then set charges to detonate the main gate?
L.G: I did not believe myself, sirs. We saw them for a moment, in the darkness, when the gate was first blown. They were wiry and sinewy, for Orks, wearing hardly any clothing. The cunning savages had painted camouflage over their skins and their heads were painted with red warpaint, and all we could clearly see were their rd eyes glaring at us from the shadows. My platoon opened fire on them, but they must have slipped into the darkness before our salve, none of them fell.
P-M: Half-glimpsed shadows? Orks wearing camouflage? Do you take us for imbeciles? Orks are barbaric and entirely single-minded. Army dogma, which has served us well for ten thousand years, teaches us this. Orks come on in a great horde, they do not slink and sneak in the shade. Are you saying that our ancestors, the illustrious commanders of the past, were fools?
L.G: I’m not saying anything of the sort, sirs! All I’m saying is that they never fought these Orks. And I pray that I never have to fight them again…
P-M: Your prayers are answered, Lieutenant. Guards! Take this prisoner to the holding cells to await execution for cowardice and incompetence.
- Extract from the transcript of Court Martial investigating the fall of Lathir Outpost
The Orks are the pinnacle of creation. For them, the great struggle is won. They have evolved a society which knows no stress or angst. Who are we to judge them? We Eldar who have failed, or the Humans, on the road to ruin in their turn. And why? Because we sought answers to questions that an Ork wouldn't even bother to ask! We see a culture that is strong and despise it as crude.
- Uthan the Perverse, Eldar Philosopher
A more ramshackle, inefficient and downright ugly fleet is hard to imagine.
- Admiral Sartus at Platea
Fifteen Orks on a dead man’s hulk,
Lookin’ down the barrel of a gun,
Gruntin’ to each other
through big, sharp teeth,
Sayin’ “This one’ll give us some fun”
Fourteen Orks on a humie’s ship,
Killin’ anything that isn’t green,
Gruntin’ to each other
through big, sharp teeth,
Sayin’ “Times be getting’ lean”
Thirteen Orks with the Captain’s chest,
Hopin’ to quench their greedy thirst,
Gruntin’ to each other
through big, sharp teeth
Sayin’ “I was da wun dat saw it first”
One lone Ork left to steal the loot,
Wishin’ it hadn’t turned out so,
Gruntin’ to itself
through big, sharp teeth
Sayin’ “I shoulda let the pilot go”
- Traditional shipmens’ song from the Cyclops Cluster
…a swarm of mechanized locusts sweeping over the land, stripping it bare of resources, bringing death and destruction to anything that stands in its path. Emperor preserve us against the predations of these so-called Orkish cults of speed!
- Cardinal Nomura at the Conclave of Hessen
We’ve been “claiming” this damned planet for the Imperium all of my life, and all of my father and my grandfather’s lives before that. I just wish someone would get around to telling those damned Orks to get off our damned land!
- Anonymous soldier on Baran
The Orks plague the galaxy from end to end with their ceaseless warring and strife. They are a race rooted so deeply in war that peace is utterly incomprehensible to them. They cannot be bargained with or bought save with weapons which they will inevitably turn against those who tried to bribe them. I pray with all my faith that some great catastrophe will annihilate them but I fear that ultimately it is they, not we, who will rule this galaxy.
- Imperial High Lord Xanthias