I hope that all the new models are in not raisin
Today, miniature games manufacturer Games Workshop announces it will be the first to use a new high quality material in it's manufacturing processes going forward.
The material will replace all plastic and resin models effecting immediately. The press release stated: "With recent advances having confirmed our theories and customer feedback about the 'Finecast' range of products, we are happy to announce that we are bringing a whole new pliable and sun cured miniatures range to modellers anyhwhere. Our revolutionizing Raisin™, dubbed Fruitcast, is set to upgrade our ranges to better accommodate gamers living in hot climates. Not only is the Raisin™ material pre-dried to prevent the melting some of our customers in hot regions unfortunately had to witness."
In a bold move, Games Workshop also replaced all plastic product with the new material. "We know that many of our customers spend a lot of money on our plastic crack," says CEO of Games Workshop, "so we toyed with the idea of making our models edible in case of emergency. This should work towards limiting the law suits against us to a minimum, resulting in overall profit margin increase of 962,566%. It will also be better for gamers, who may stop giving blood to afford models. In addition, with their edible nature, we expect more gamers to take advantage of our quality gaming products as snacks just before their armies get updated, because they will be hungry by then and also all of their models will be made crap by our dedicated crap-turning R&D team." - "Further profit margins of 670,002,450% will be attained through gamers putting miniatures into their mouths than on eBay."
Price ranges are said to increase across the board, with the cheapest models increasing by as much as 70%. Though, the high range of models will presumably be decreased in price. This is because Games Workshop's latest fad is that they want just one price to apply for all of their product. The price for almost all boxed sets, blisters and individual paints and brushes is believed to be around £500.