You're not the most deranged mod.
So... What now?
I match your furry and raise you... clubbing baby seals.
Is this how you now go to games, tourneys, etc? If so, do you appear with a pimp cane in hand as well?
Yes. As some high school kid in the states did for a prom date, I send tweets out to every porn star I can think of asking if they'd like to make a quick $1,000 for a day of standing around and teasing gamers.
Normally I get at least one response, if multiple, I pick the skankiest (which is a difficult thing to determine when dealing with porn stars) and offer her the role, while kindly thanking the other applicants and letting them know that I will keep them in mind for my next "outing." They come to the event, I show them a fat wad of $20s, and all goes as planned.
When I'm driving her back to the airport, I kick her out of my car in the ghetto so I don't have to pay.
Gamers see chicks, I keep my money, and porn stars have no souls so no one gives a shit that she's now probably lying in a gutter somewhere. Success.