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post #1 of 21 (permalink) Old 11-02-08, 05:47 PM Thread Starter
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Default Terminator

Ok so how ballz'd up is the Terminator franchise?

So let me get this right. In the future some dumb fucker creates a computer intelligence system ( try's not to remember the British intelligence satellite systems name) that wipes out the human race.

Ok so the first movie;-

Looks a bit dated now being made as it was in 1984 but back in the day it was the shit. James Cameron, easily one of the best directors of all time, put this big muscle bound dumb ass in as the machine with out charisma (rather apt really) to kill a we boy before he's born. In general the movie is good. It's dark, fast paced and as i said before for it's time it was pretty advanced.

Fast forward to 1991 and Judgement day and we find the teenaged John Connn....... Whoa! Hold on a fucking second. 1984 to 1991 is 7 years how the fuck is he a teenager? Ok well never mind, Arnie is back (see he said he would) and this time he's the good guy! Ehh ok! Linda Hamilton is there again and she's rather buffed up. Perhaps she wanted to go on gladiators! Ed Furlong was ace as John Connor and Vasquez was there but this time in a dress!! Robert Patrick is very good as the T1000, with it's wonderful special effects it was a great end to the series...........

What? That wasn't the end? Oh shit there's another!

Edit Rant: On a side note, how the fuck if you cant get metal weapons through the space time whatever the fuck it is, do you get a fully metal T-1000 through? Like for fuck sake. Couldn't they have just wrapped a ray gun inside a sirloin steak and a bit of fucking newspaper or something? Yes the Jakey sent back through time to save John Conner! (i really shouldn't edit my own post)

Ok fast-forward again to 2003 and here comes Kristanna Loken as the T-X and lets just say it wasn't just the machines that were rising! Ed Furlong was....... Hold on where the fuck is Ed Furlong? Oh rehab! Well there's Nick Stahl; Ehmmm and Clare Danes blah blah blah blah. It was rubbish! It takes place mostly during the day, it has no tension, no plot and i didn't even get to see Kristanna Loken's titties! I got to see fucking Arnies titties! Gutted.

I own :rise of the machines but only so that i have the set. It's an awful movie. Terminator was a classic of the 80's and T2:judgement day was a classic of the 90's and this was just shit.

Well at least we can rest easy knowing that they have stopped flogging that particular dead horse....... What? A fucking tv show? Awe shite!

Ok so along comes Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. What? Wasn't she fucking dead? Well, and here's where the plot gets silly(er).

So the stunning Summer Glau is the terminator sent to save Conner played by Furlong/Stahl/Dekker whoever he fucking is now. Oh and Reese's brother turns up. Apparently he is dis trot to discover that he's dead! Aye whatever. So it starts off after T2, i think. They then time travel forward to the present day (which is before T3 which has already happened, sort of. Ahh fuck knows). I guess this is to do with budget, after all you cant do a retro series on tv, it cost to much (life on Mars anybody?) Ok so again it rather shit. It plods along not really doing much, it talks rubbish about how Skynet is a chess computer and not a super advanced military computer. Then; Fuck me that's Shirley Manson! Ok so the lead singer of Garbage is a T-1000. Explains a lot! Make the "when i grow up" song rather redundant! But what the hell.

So Skynet is sending back terminators to take over prominent parts of business and law enforcement (looks suspiciously at Bill Gates). If this was the case, why doesn't it just send back a bloody army? There is like 50 new terminators each episode. Invasion of the body snatchers gone mad! It like they've got a bloody multi-pass for the inter dimensional subway!

Lets just agree to ignore it, im sure they cant arse things up any more........ Oh your shitting me a 4th movie!

Holy future apocalypse Batman, it's Batman! Yes Christian (i dont want to do any more Sci-fi in case i become stereo typed) Bale is John Connor.

*I pause this rant to insert a small link to a picture*

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1411553024/tt0438488

Terminator Salvation! What's it going to save? The fucking plot? Look at the picture. That is a T-800. What the fuck is Bale going to do to it with a M-4? Blow his bloody foot off when it rebounds off the damn toaster oven!

Well that's it i give up. I can only hope that T-$, (Oops i didnt mean to hold the shift button down) will be better than the last. This horse isnt just flogged! It's been flogged, skinned, cut up, put into dog food, regurgatated and spat out again. I bet Arnie is happy he's now the Govenor of de California!

Ahh well. I've had my rant! Now im going to kick the dog! Here poochy, poochy, poo!


MarzM
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"Sententia professio meus pugna securis quod ornamentum of bellum" 51:20

Last edited by MarzM; 11-02-08 at 06:11 PM.
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post #2 of 21 (permalink) Old 11-05-08, 09:52 AM
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Rise of the machines never happened.

T4 has Christian Bale in it, so I'm willing to give it the benefit of the doubt.
Stan Winston was working on it when he died.
Terminator is only going to be a trilogy. Terminator, T2, T:Salvation.

Hey! Where'd ... Everybody ... go?
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post #3 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-30-09, 06:08 AM
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Default Terminator: Salvation

Suprised to see that no one has posted about the new Terminator movie coming out soon.

TERMINATOR: SALVATION

Looks promising to me.

Last edited by Unforgiven302; 04-30-09 at 06:13 AM.
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post #4 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-30-09, 07:06 AM
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I've been looking forward to this movie for some time now. As soon as Christian Bale was attached in the role of John Connor i was sold.

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post #5 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-30-09, 12:56 PM
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This movie is going to kick ass! T3 was ok but you could tell even from the trailer that it wouldn't be all that great. All the previews of T:S that I have seen just look fantastic.

one thing I want is the ability to split my fire everywhere, it makes no sense that a squad of 10 guard or marines or whatever all have to fire at 1 target with everything, is the guy with the lascannon not smart enough to realize maybe he would be better off firing at the massive tank looming overhead instead of the little man no bigger than a squat running at him, or is that far too complex for the 10yr olds?

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post #6 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-30-09, 12:57 PM
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Undecided; the trailer looks a bit cheesey. Will still see it though hoping it will prove me wrong.

Last edited by nightfish; 04-30-09 at 12:59 PM.
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post #7 of 21 (permalink) Old 04-30-09, 09:31 PM
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Christian "Batman" Bale as John "Badass" Connor? Sounds like a recipe for pure awesomite to me

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post #8 of 21 (permalink) Old 05-04-09, 11:47 AM
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I think it sounds awesome. The trailer looks pretty good. I loved T1 and T2 and I have always been wanting a Terminator movie set after judgment day and to see the actually war and now I will.

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post #9 of 21 (permalink) Old 05-04-09, 05:50 PM
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No one posted a link to it because it's another Terminator movie that didn't really need to be made. That being said it doesn't interest me at all, but it looks like it will be a good movie though.

Cry Sotek, and let slip the Lizards of War!

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post #10 of 21 (permalink) Old 05-04-09, 10:20 PM
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Everything I've seen has made this movie look awesome beyond measure!

Been gone for a while, but Alpharius commands my return
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