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post #1 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-24-12, 08:30 AM Thread Starter
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Default The best line ever in a TV program?

Having just watched Game of Thrones S2 Ep4 'Garden of Bones' I almost choked on my morning coffee laughing at this brilliant line. All praise to the script writers - this was definitely NOT in the book but what a corker...

Scene: Kings landing Throne Room - Tyrion and Bronn have just rescued Sansa's dignity at court and as they are leaving converse:

Bronn: "The little kings backed up. Clogged from balls to brains!"

Tyrion: "You think dipping his wick will cure what ails him?"

Bronn: "There's no cure for being a cunt...but the boys at that age"

Excellent line - bear it in mind the next time some online twat is annoying you
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post #2 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-24-12, 09:45 PM
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Best line ever.... tough choice. This one in a hallucination from Farscape definitely makes the Top 5. (Watch the clip for the context.)

John: After all that's happened, how do you expect me to trust you?
Scorpius (Harvey): Well I think that, like religion, its an individual choice. Either you believe and therefore, bunnies are unnecessary. Or you don't! In which case, chocolate?

Also this,

Janitor: What the hell are you?
Todd: I'm the Todd.

Oh and this in Arrested Development.

Gob: I think I was just a little too believeable.
(And then)
Gob: Police! Open up!

LotN - The Kabal of Shattered Souls Project Log - Check out Talk Wargaming for reviews by Lord of the Night.

Last edited by Lord of the Night; 04-24-12 at 09:47 PM.
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post #3 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 12:58 AM
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Apparently no one watches Archer.

Option 1:

Archer: Oh my God Cyril! You killed a hooker!
Cyril: No.. I... Call girl. She was a...
Archer: No Cyril, when they're dead, they're just hookers!

Option 2:

Trinette: Wait a minute. You liar, this isn't a condom! It's from a friggin' candy bar wrapper!
Archer: So? Sometimes I like to treat myself.
Trinette: Well, sometimes I like ovulate.
Archer: Well, I have to sleep, so go do it somewhere else.

Or my personnel favorite:

Terrorist: Tell us where the money is!
(Punches Pam, the overweight ,blond Human Resources lady in the face)
(Pam then spits out blood and says)
Pam: Who taught you how to punch? Your husband?

Actually, there are far to many to list. Most of which need the visual help of the actual show.

"In the game of chess, you must never let your opponent see your pieces."
-Captain Zapp Brannigan
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post #4 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 02:49 AM
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Archer is the Shit. When James Bond sleeps he dreams he's Sterling Archer.

Cypher, I just watched that episode tonight. Bronne gets all the cool lines. "Careful, we wouldn't want to get blood all over that pretty white cloak of yours."

Abandon GW, win back your wallet. Play Infinity!

Last edited by DeathKlokk; 04-25-12 at 02:51 AM.
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post #5 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 02:53 AM
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We don't get Archer as far as I know, sounds like we might be missing out!
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post #6 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 07:19 AM
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oh archer is fan-fucking-tastic absolutely love it.

and bronn is an utter badass

but what about adventure time with finn and jake?

Ive started to update this project loge again, you should all check it out. it has some stupid things on it, and some fun things on it haha

Order of the Crimson Dawn (Rogue trader pirates, using Coteaz henchmen spam rules)
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post #7 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 10:34 AM
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Stargate SG1, where Jack and Teal'c are experiencing the same day over and over again. Every time the day repeats, they are sent through the same medical tests. On the 4th repetition when the doctor shines her penlight in Jack's eye:

"I ask you... what could POSSIBLY be in my EYE that would explain this???"

90% of people think they are above average.

Statistically Improbable. Psychologically Inevitable.
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post #8 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 10:39 AM
nice boy, daft though !
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post #9 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 11:00 AM
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from merlin (i forget which episode)
Arthur: Merlin, can you do something for me?
Merlin: Yes sire, of course I can, anything you want.
Arthur: Shut up (walks away)
Merlin: .....Yes, I can do that, of course I can do that, how could I not, you're the king.
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post #10 of 33 (permalink) Old 04-25-12, 12:00 PM
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Early Celebrity Juice

Fearne Cotton arguing with Keith Lemon over an answer.

Keith: Its my show what I say goes.
Fearne: No, we are all equal in the show, look theres an F on the front of my desk.
Keith, I'll tell you what that F stands for it stands for FUCKING SHUT UP!


"In the absence of orders, go find something and kill it" - Erwin Rommel
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